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May 13, 2012 2:29 pm  #1


Fetish and your personality type

I am curious about the personality type of crying fetishists.  Somehow, we are able to see crying differently than most people, though I don't think we'll ever know why!  But maybe there are some characteristics that tend to pop up in crying fetishists that could explain why they are turned on by tears instead of turned off. 

I have no idea, but here's a start.  Are you:

1) An Introvert/shy or Extrovert/outgoing?

2) A very emotional person or not particularly emotional (not what your potential for emotion is in certain situations, but what you naturally are in general).

What are some more relevant questions to personality type?  Anyone??

My answers so far are

Introvert
Not emotional

I think in my particular case, both personality features contribute a bit to my fetish.  As an introvert, I don't tend to bond with people easily because I'm so shy, and I crave more close friendships in my life, so I think I look to crying as the ultimate excuse where I could bond deeply with someone.  I also think I seek deep emotions from others because I need that kind of heightened emotional state to help me experience being emotional with other people.  I can cry on cue, so I certainly don't lack emotions, but with anything that doesn't involve my own personal pain, I feel fairly detached -- I have sometimes even watched other people react to situations (both genders) and felt like I'm from another planet because I don't feel very affected.  I need quite a bit of drama to get involved emotionally, so that's why my favorite fantasies have involved deep dark secrets being revealed or crying from pain instead of from pleasure.  My theory is that it fills a void in me and helps balance me out.  Otherwise, the concept of feeling this way is rather guilt-inducing, to say the least! (like I said, I do have emotions... it's just that my emotions are all about me) 

 

May 13, 2012 11:15 pm  #2


Re: Fetish and your personality type

Interesting idea! I am an introvert and very emotional.

I suppose I see crying as a very personal thing, to be shared with one person intimately, and that suits my introverted personality. Although I would have said crying is quite a taxing social situation to respond to, and I often think a slight fear of crying persons and not knowing how to react is what makes it arousing for me. As for my emotional nature, I think I empathise quite strongly, and the empathic response to crying is definitely part of my fetish.

As for other personality questions, you could always look at the Myers-Briggs personality types - there's a test here: http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp and then you can look up the specifics of the personality types on Wikipedia, etc. I am INFP - Introversion, Intuition, Feeling, Perception (as opposed to Extroversion, Sensing, Thinking, Judgement) - again, you can look up what this all means. It seems to be a pretty good indicator of my personality, but I don't know how accurate it would be for everyone. I'm interested to see that in the Wikipedia page for my type it states 'INFPs guard the emotional well-being of others, consoling those in distress' - well, quite!

 

May 14, 2012 12:15 am  #3


Re: Fetish and your personality type

Wow, I actually have done those types of tests several times in my life (in connection with career counselling) and I'm an INFP too!  Would never have anticipated the very first response to this thread to be from another INFP (especially since my career counsellor had given me the impression it was one of the rarer types!)  I'd imagine we will mostly be different personality types on here, though the most interesting aspects to me personally are whether people are higher on Feeling vs. Thinking, or Introversion vs. Extroversion (I was actually secretly thinking of Myers-Briggs when I made the post!)  I am not sure how Sensing/Intuition or Judging/Perceiving would relate to the fetish except I suppose that a Sensing person could be more focused on the physical aspects of the crying while an Intuitive person could be more focused on the meaning of the crying.  In theory.

I will admit I am guilty of following my feelings a bit too much when it comes to decision-making.  I am definitely more Feeling than Thinking whenever I've taken those types of tests.  Guess the "Feeling" part shows up differently for different people.  I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm illogical -- but guess I'm not exactly practical in my day-to-day living (though highly creative!)   Guess I'd say my feelings are probably what drive me to do things and be interested in things.  Which does go with the fetish as well, in the sense that I have a general "interest" in feelings.

But for those who don't like taking tests, feel free to just respond with what you know about your own tendency towards being emotional (which I guess is a slightly different question from whether you rely more on feeling or thinking to make decisions), and tendency towards being an introvert or an extrovert!

Last edited by woundedpuppy (May 14, 2012 12:46 am)

     Thread Starter
 

May 14, 2012 12:46 am  #4


Re: Fetish and your personality type

I'm definitely an extrovert, and I'm about average emotionally. I'm not overly emotional at all and am pretty logical and level-headed, but I do tend to be sensitive sometimes and cry really easily at movies and such. I took that Myers-Briggs test, and apparently I'm an ENFJ (extroverted, intuitive, feeling, judging). That's probably sort of accurate, but I wish the test were more on a sliding scale (ranking each question from 1-5 or something) because on about half of the questions, I really could not decide which way to go. Oh well, I think personalities are much more complicated than that test makes them out to be. Interesting to compare, though.

Woundedpuppy, can you really cry on cue? How do you go about that? Not to veer off topic in your thread, but you made me curious!

 

May 14, 2012 12:47 am  #5


Re: Fetish and your personality type

Introvert. In fact I suffer from social anxiety.

Inwardly I consider myself quite emotional. Outwardly I am sometimes perceived to be cold and distant. I guess expressing emotions is what I have a problem with.


Ugly crying is pretty crying
 

May 14, 2012 1:17 am  #6


Re: Fetish and your personality type

a little bit of both, more so introvert

I'm not all that emotional

 

May 14, 2012 1:26 am  #7


Re: Fetish and your personality type

carrotcake wrote:

Woundedpuppy, can you really cry on cue? How do you go about that? Not to veer off topic in your thread, but you made me curious!

Mostly I've used music (music that reminds me of something, or has meaning to me), or even just hearing that same music in my head can sometimes be enough.  The other way I've done it is thinking about subjects that would have that effect on me.  I don't really want to say what subjects I've used, but I've used different ones.

I actually haven't tried it in quite some time, but if I'm rusty, I think listening to familiar music would bring it back within a few tries, because I think once you get into doing it, it's easier to do (you can kind of condition yourself).  Although I worked up the skill, unfortunately, I've almost never had a reason to use it.  I would like to try to use it in a play someday, though (I know it wouldn't be nearly as easy to do on stage!), and especially might use it someday if a guy seems like he wants to open up to me but is being hesitant (to make him feel less self-conscious about his own crying, therefore hopefully increasing my chances of seeing *him* cry!)

I guess "on cue" might be sort of an exaggeration... I guess I can "make myself cry" is all I'm trying to say.  By using the help of music and imagination.  Which is a heck of a lot harder to do in front of someone than alone.  I admire actors so much for that!!!  I'm not shy about it, but I just find it way more distracting to be watched (harder to zone into the right emotion).

     Thread Starter
 

May 14, 2012 1:44 am  #8


Re: Fetish and your personality type

Interesting responses so far!  More introverts at this point, but will be interested to see the rest of the responses.

     Thread Starter
 

May 14, 2012 1:53 am  #9


Re: Fetish and your personality type

Extrovert, definitely, haha. When I'm not in a shy mood - which happens less because I'm actually shy, and more because a lot of people intimidate me -  I'm generally very outgoing.

I don't really know how emotional I am. Even though I'm not fond of crying in front of people, I have no problem getting super impassioned/upset, I guess, and no problem talking with people about times I've cried. And I'm pretty easily moved by things. But at the same time, I always have this desire to sort of intellectualize emotions so they're easier to process - whether they're happy or sad or just, like, over the top - so I'm not really sure.

 

May 14, 2012 5:09 am  #10


Re: Fetish and your personality type

I think I have traits of both here and there depending on the situation, but I'd say overall I'm an extrovert. (All the personality tests I've taken give me an extroverted result, this one said ESFP - Extroverted Sensing Feeling Perceiving) 

When it comes to my own problems, I have a very hard time accessing my emotions. I get too bent on being percieved as your resident spunky little bubbly ray of sunshine, and not being of trouble to other people, causing me to leave my issues undealt with. Talking about my struggles is just a very, very intimate thing for me. I feel most at ease talking to my best friend (probably because I have romantic feelings toward him) and even then, I associate it with guilt. However, when someone else opens up to me about their problems, I soften up quite a lot. My main trigger is definitely sympathy. So, I would say I'm not all that quick to get emotional when it comes to my own matters, but I'm very emotional when it comes to others showing vulnerability.

 

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