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August 20, 2012 11:24 pm  #1


Male observation!

Well, after a few YEARS between male crying observations (the last one was at a wedding), I've finally got another male observation to share!!  This observation is the single most dramatic male display of crying I've ever seen -- mind-blowing, especially for someone like me who is not used to it!!!

This was at a church funeral.  Believe it or not (and this will be very hard for you folks to believe!), it only occurred to me that I might see some crying that day once we actually GOT there (or maybe it was on the ride there, can't remember which!), and even then, I didn't really think about it too much because I basically assumed I wouldn't see any.  I mean, it's just the way things always go for me, right?  So why would today be any different?  Lowered expectations, I guess...

Anyway, at the funeral, a guy (youngish, maybe in his '20's) got up and made an animated speech (he was a good speaker).  I was several pews back.  Anyway, suddenly he broke down mid-speech.  He paused, putting his hand to his mouth, and struggled to speak, voice wavering, and restarted a few times -- but managed to get back on track for most of the rest of the speech.  His voice still sounded emotional during a few brief moments here and there, and he ended on an emotional tone as well.  I thought that was the end of it, but already it was an amazing observation and a big deal, considering how rare this is for me to witness.  But it was nothing compared to what happened next. 

As he got back to his pew, a guy (relative? partner?) stood up and they hugged tightly.  But they didn't just hug -- he essentially collapsed in the other guy's arms.  And after a moment, he started sobbing.  LOUDLY.  HIGH PITCHED sobs.  Feeling it from the gut kind of sobs.  It was a complete dramatic breakdown.  He cried into the other guy's shoulder and the other guy just kept hugging him.  The whole congregation stood completely still, and other than the sobbing, you could have heard a pin drop while this was going on.  There were maybe 1 or 2 seconds between each high pitched sob (if I find something comparable in a video clip, I'll post it).  Anyway, the pastor just waited politely until he was done and took his seat (probably under a minute, although it seemed like it lasted a while because of the awkwardness, so who knows?)  At one point, I had averted my eyes for a second (mostly for the benefit of those sitting next to me who didn't know about my fetish, as I didn't want to seem too interested nor too impolite out of respect for the guy), but immediately realized that it didn't matter, as everyone else was watching anyway.  I found it interesting that while many people reacted audibly to the first mini-breakdown during the speech (there was a collective reactive sympathetic sound from the crowd), you couldn't hear any reactions during the more dramatic crying.  I did not look around to see people's reactions, either. 

Well, that's the gist of it!  I didn't see the guy after that until at the very end when he was calmed down (poor guy!), so I'm not sure how he fared during the rest of the service.  I didn't see tears and can't remember whether there was any tear-wiping either, but remember, I wasn't up close.  What sticks with me is the breakdown -- those heavy, high pitched sobs!!!  Wow, what depth of feeling they conveyed!  My tastes have grown since the first crying forum was started a few years back, and after having seen this firsthand, I hope I will still be able to be satisfied with less dramatic crying.  What made it OK, I guess, was that he broke down in the arms of someone who cared about him -- someone was there to take his pain and hold onto it as he released it.  I find that very beautiful, and I had an unobstructed view of this transaction.  Clearly, the crier was comfortable with the other guy, and obviously OK crying in front of all of us, or you'd think he would have left the room, or even attempted to sit down to conceal his crying better -- or perhaps, possibly, he was just so overcome with feelings that he couldn't get it together to do anything physically or mentally other than collapse right there until those feelings had subsided.  Anyway, because I was not emotionally close with those involved, I've taken what happened and fantasized about the same style of crying happening with people I am attracted to.  I can't say how it would really feel in real life -- I haven't been there, and obviously there are many factors going on depending how emotionally attached you are to the situation -- but in my fantasy life?  The concept (holding someone close during large, uncontrolled sobs) really fascinates me.  Wow.

Thanks for listening, and hey, now I feel somewhat 'normal' for having had a male crying obs of my own!  And I wasn't even looking for it, I swear!!

Last edited by woundedpuppy (August 20, 2012 11:55 pm)

 

August 21, 2012 8:45 am  #2


Re: Male observation!

Wow, what an observation - I'm so pleased you experienced some male crying at long last and one that reaches the core of your own crying desires.
I know its not necessarily a requirement for you but I would have been interested in how this guy dealt with his tears. Guy's crying in a public place tend to hide their tears as its a very obvious sign that they are crying and have lost control. But, in this case the loud sobbing is an even more obvious sign that he was crying. As he let himself cry like this I wonder if he allowed his tears to flow - which must have been present during such intense crying.

You will probably replay this event over and over for sometime to come. I don't know if you were attracted to the guy who was crying? Whenever I see a woman cry I don't tend to transpose the crying to another woman that perhaps I've never seen crying - I take each crying event and remember it exactly for that particular person. Perhaps this is because I find different people cry in very different ways and it does not work for me to imagine someone crying in the same way. I am however guilty of fantasing about a crying event after the fact, more so if I'm attracted to the crier - I'll be the one holding her, wiping / kissing the tears away - it diffently becomes more of a sexual attraction at this point in time as well which it is not always the case at the time the person is actually crying.

Hope it's not as long until you experience your next male crying observation.

 

August 21, 2012 6:57 pm  #3


Re: Male observation!

@Tearhunter - He was definitely attractive and I know I could have started fantasizing about him right then and there -- the only thing that stopped me was that it seemed quite wrong to do so in a church at a funeral service, yipes!!!!  I didn't know him or the deceased personally, so that accounts for my detachment in this situation, but still, I felt I had to postpone the fantasizing for moral reasons.  But I'm afraid with the passage of time, even just hours, it is harder to see and feel the moment quite as clearly.  And I'm sure I won't see this guy again, so I think that's WHY I started out fantasizing about him and the other guy (keeping it as REAL and exact as possible, because what beats REALITY, right?) but switched to someone else afterwards.  If I thought I might see this guy again, I would be secretly attracted to him,no doubt, and looking for excuses to see him again, just to see his face and keep imagining the tears and crying.

As for how he dealt with his tears, I can answer this somewhat.  I can't remember how he dealt with the tears during the speech (if there were any - he may have just welled up) as I was not up close and couldn't make out that sort of detail on his face (and was probably in SHOCK that I was getting a crying observation and not noticing every detail like that), but as for the sobbing part?  His face was buried the ENTIRE time on the other guy's shoulder, so that's where ALL his tears would have landed (on the guy's shirt).  He didn't lift his head at all.  The guy hugging him was slightly taller, so it seemed to work.  His face probably still would have been a bit wet after lifting off the shirt to sit down, but I wasn't close enough to see.  I would have kept an eye on him for the rest of the service to see if he cried again after that, but I couldn't see him through the crowd.  I'm sure he wouldn't have cried so dramatically if he hadn't been the one giving the speech.  It probably all built up during the speech and then, pow.  The more you hold back your emotions, the more forcefully they come gushing out later.  And there is probably some scientific explanation for why the more you hold your emotions back, the more likely you are to sob hard (which is why I allow myself to cry when I feel the need to... I would much rather let a few tears flow and show a bit of embarrassment than hold it all in, fail, and then make hard sobbing sounds).

Last edited by woundedpuppy (August 21, 2012 7:16 pm)

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August 23, 2012 1:49 am  #4


Re: Male observation!

Congratulations on your ob! When I saw "male observation" and your name next to it, I was so excited for you. I really feel for the poor guy, though.
It's good you wrote it down, that can help the memory solidify.


It is such a secret place, the land of tears.
-- Antoine de Saint Exupery, "The Little Prince"
 

August 23, 2012 3:36 am  #5


Re: Male observation!

Thanks, Meantangerine -- I'm glad you were excited for me, because this is honestly a big deal for me, and sharing it with people who would understand what a big deal it was and feel happy for me is part of the whole experience, you know?  How I longed for this day to come!  Oops, put like that, that sounds cruel... well, you know what I mean!  It's not like I had anything to do with making this guy cry.  He was going to cry whether I was there or not.  It's just great to be able to share.

What's also great is that I almost feel like I can *relax* a bit now that I've had a recent obs (even though an interactive, comforting, lengthy type of obs is my number one).  What this obs lacked in interaction, it certainly made up for in intensity!  I can still hear those sobbing sounds.  And if I concentrate on them hard enough to make them real enough, they turn me on.  Not because of the way they "sound".  I think it's because I know they came from such real, deep emotions (in other words, I don't think an actor faking these sounds could turn me on... it would sound so weird!!  Yet an actor fake sniffling or fake sighing/ pretending to wipe tears away might still turn me on... if that makes any sense to anybody...)

Last edited by woundedpuppy (August 23, 2012 9:34 pm)

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August 23, 2012 3:56 am  #6


Re: Male observation!

If I go to a funeral, and unless it's of someone I really cared about, I'd be very conscious of the fact that I might get some obs. It's odd that you weren't, actually. But..that's probably a good thing.


Ugly crying is pretty crying
 

August 23, 2012 9:20 pm  #7


Re: Male observation!

I know!  I take it as a sign that my fetish isn't as strong as it once was -- I'm obviously not thinking about it as much (even though I check this forum nearly every day!)  I personally welcome the diminishment of my fetish, since it's of little use to me, but if it were of actual use to me (like if I were in frequent contact with crying men), I think I'd like my fetish to be stronger, not weaker.

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August 23, 2012 9:51 pm  #8


Re: Male observation!

I have to second meantangerine's excitement when I saw that you had a male observation! I know you've been waiting quite a while, and I know how satisfying and amazing it is to get a good obs after so long.

I also loved your story! I know what you mean about tastes changing as you see more crying material. It definitely takes more intense sobbing and more dramatic visuals/audio to turn me on when I watch videos or read stories, but it seems to be different in real life -- if I'm watching a video, it needs to be pretty intense, but in real life, subtle observations are just as good because the emotion is palpable right in front of me. I also know what you mean about the shock that often comes with a real-life observation. I've been known to (not proudly) stop and stare in disbelief, though I try to be subtle, just because I'm so surprised and amazed that it's happening in front of me.

I love the sense of complete emotional exhaustion that the crying man seemed to have. He just collapsed in the other man's arms, so emotionally drained that he was unable to hold it in or control its intensity. That's the kind of thing I love to see and fantasize about. Did you happen to notice any details about the man who was hugging him? For example, was he squeezing him tightly, was he rubbing his back to console him, or was he just standing still and holding the sobbing man? Did he look pained as well, or did he just look concerned? I don't know if you could see these details from where you were sitting, but I love knowing about the actual act of comforting that took place!

 

August 24, 2012 12:44 am  #9


Re: Male observation!

The crier was facing my direction (face buried on the comforter's shoulder) and the comforter's back was towards me so I couldn't see his expression, though luckily for me, this is the angle I preferred -- to see the crier's face, even if his face was buried!  Yes, it was definitely what I would call a tight squeeze.  Did he rub his back?  Probably at some point, yet I can't really remember.  The main thing was the steady, tight squeeze, and if he rubbed his back (which he probaby did), I'd say it would have been a firm type of rubbing.  I'm sure he must have uttered something at some point, even if just a gutteral sound, but guess what, I don't remember that either.  But the comforter basically seemed very strong and ready in his role -- at least this was the overall feeling I got.  He probably saw it coming moments before it happened and was ready for it (just a guess).

By the way, your comment on needing more intense crying for video enjoyment as compared to real life makes total sense... I think that in an up-close situation, much less intensity would be required to strike the same chord with me.  It's just been so long that I had forgotten that point... so thanks for reminding me.  In fact, now I remember picking my favorite all-time obs as one that I count as crying even though it didn't really involve crying... where a guy was struggling so hard to tell me a deep secret and trying not to cry and we were lying in a bed hugging each other... and he kept closing his eyes and chickening out, and I kept hugging him and told him that it was OK... that he could change his mind about telling me... but he insisted he was going to tell me (and finally did).  So, in real life, yeah... I think I can get quite a lot out of someone even just trying very hard *not* to cry!  Phew!

Last edited by woundedpuppy (August 24, 2012 1:01 am)

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August 24, 2012 1:53 am  #10


Re: Male observation!

Wounded, I understand what you mean.  In some ways, observing/being with someone who is struggling NOT to cry is more satisfying than having them cry right off.  It's that moment of release when they finally give in that gets me - sort of like a sneeze building and building until it finally lets go.


"We have our stalking memories, and they will demand their rightful tears."
Anonymous
 

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