After almost two decades, I finally found the clip online that I've always attributed to the beginning of my fetish!!!

When I was very little (4-6ish), I watched this show every afternoon called The Puzzle Place. The characters were lifelike puppet/marionette things (very well done; they actually looked like kids dressed in full-body costumes and you could barely see the strings). It ran for three years, so there weren't too many episodes, but this one really stuck out to me. The main focus was that one of the boys was upset about someone stealing his favorite doughnut, and he started to cry. The other kids laughed at him for crying, but throughout the episode, they all realize that it's okay for boys and girls to cry. At the end, they show a montage of kids and adults of all ages crying over happy and sad things.  I remember watching this montage in slow motion, particularly one clip of a boy sobbing, his exposed mouth contorting and trembling like crazy.

So I've allllwaaayyys wanted to find this somewhere because I consider it to be the launching point of my fetish, but the show is almost impossible to find because it was never released on VHS, and it aired long before the internet was mainstream. BUT OH MY GOD. Today, on a whim, I decided to Google the episode one more time, and I FOUND THE CLIP OF THE MONTAGE!! OMG. I almost hyperventilated with shock!!

Unfortunately, I'm not going to post it here, because most of the people crying on the video are children. And of course, now that I'm watching it, it doesn't arouse me or anything because it's mostly children (that particularly memorable boy was only about 9). But when I was 4, obviously, that didn't matter. I just feel so relieved to have found it. I feel as if I've completed some unknown circle or something!

Of course, who knows whether that was actually the beginning of my fetish, but it's my first memory of intense fascination with crying.

Just wanted to share!