That's pretty funny.

Do women get judged if they don't cry during vidaai? Probably. They may get accused of becoming too modern.

Though in my experience real vidaais are becoming less of a thing. The practice I see nowadays is that the couple gets married in a small ceremony, and then a large ceremonial wedding party months or even a year later. There will be a vidai at the end, but the bride has already moved in with the husband so it's not an occasion for tears.

And if you're already living away from family, vadais won't be a sad occasion.

Maybe you should go for it. 🤔

truffle wrote:

I agree it’s totally outdated, in a world where women are getting married later in life and have lived on their own for school/work, or are already living with their fiancé (like I am). Besides, the original reason for the crying is actually very unpleasant (fear, uncertainty about an arranged marriage, apprehension about leaving home) so I wouldn’t wish that on anyone in the 21st century.

But for tradition’s sake, I’m sure I can manage a tear or two to satisfy the gossipy uncles and aunties who will be there watching and judging ugh.

And I'm sure you'll look stunningly beautiful with a few tears rolling down your cheeks. If they're emotional tears it will be a big plus.