I told my boyfriend fairly early on, maybe a couple months in. He was also completely cool with it. He wasn't terribly interested, but he said he could understand it and it didn't change how he felt about me.

That said, I also told my ex after we had been together for a year and a half, and he did NOT react well.

@truffle Your wife sounds amazing and so supportive! It is SUCH a relief, but I'm still sort of trying to process that he actually knows since this was something I had never planned to tell anyone. By the time I actually told him he was like "I don't meant to trivialize, but that's it? I thought you were going to tell me you killed a man!" haha! 

@meantangerine: Oh man, it must have been scary having someone have a bad reaction. I'm glad your current boyfriend understands, you're super brave to tell him so early on!
I was really scared my boyfriend would misunderstand because it's so easy to take it the wrong way. Like I had to really explain that it's not like a masochistic thing, I don't want to cause it (unless it's happy tears of course, those are cute) and that it doesn't trivialize the emotions at all, that first and foremost I just like being trusted and being a source of comfort. (sorry for wordy reply hahah)

@inmyarms: That's a really smooth way to test the waters! His reaction seems like a pretty normal one, that's more what I expected from my BF so I was pretty shocked when he was wanting details and sort of... embracing it.

Maybe you have the right partner, that you can trust, that you can tell them about the fetish. There are many good things about my husband (he never hits me, sometimes he prepares dinner for us...just kidding) but one thing I would never talk about with him ist my crush in crying. It just doesn't feel right.

I'm so glad he had such a positive reaction! He sounds like a great man.

I told my boyfriend about a year into our relationship. I might have told him sooner, except I hadn't yet really defined it as a fetish (or at least thought of it using that terminology). I remember telling him when we were first dating that I liked a man who wasn't afraid of expressing his emotions, and he seemed relieved because he's a pretty emotional guy. But he didn't seem surprised when I told him about my fetish, since I was always so quick to comfort him and obviously enjoyed it.

I got lucky in that he had such a positive reaction. He actually tells me that he loves this part of me, because his parents did not show respect for his emotions, and he's so happy that he's found someone who actively loves that aspect of his personality. He says it makes him feel safe and loved. I'm still always self-conscious that he might think I'm enjoying his pain, but he reassures me that he doesn't think that. He says that when he cries, my fetish doesn't even occur to him. Which I have trouble wrapping my mind around, but I believe him.