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May 4, 2021 10:54 pm  #1

Drifter's (actual?) last day

It was a bright, sunny day at Silver Hatch Racetrack. Tin Top and Drifter were speeding around the racetrack, when suddenly, Drifter started coughing relentlessly, as his exhaust smoke turned black, and his engine started making unhappy noises. "Are you OK, partner"? Asked Tin Top. "Uh, ye-ye-yess", Drifter stuttered. "You don't look OK, your exhaust is black and you're coughing a lot". Drifter pulled over onto the grass, where his engine conked out. Tin Top called Plugger to bring Drifter back to the workshop, where Big Chris was to do a full inspection on him. Not wanting to distress the other cars with a result of his findings, he asked Roary, Maxi, Cici and Tin Top to meet Marsha on the track for a race. Back in the workshop, Big Chris had locked up and said that the other cars were not to enter the workshop. Big Chris was explaining to Drifter that his parts were failing, and finding new parts for him was going to be really difficult. As Big Chris explained this to Drifter, he noticed that Drifter's eyes were starting to water. Although all the other cars were banished from the workshop, Roary decided to go back out of curiosity about what was going on in the workshop, and why Drifter wasn't joining them in the race. He drove as close to the workshop door as he could so he could tell what was going on. He overheard Big Chris mention "scrapheap" and "how are we going to tell the other cars". If it wasn't for his metal body, the color would've drained from Roary's face. Instead, he just stayed there in pure shock, unable to move. When he regained composure, he drove back towards the other cars. With tears in his eyes, Roary told Maxi, Cici and Tin Top that Drifter was going to the scrapheap. Cici, like Roary, froze in shock, Tin Top was frantically panicking, and Maxi started sobbing. Soon, Roary, Maxi, Tin Top and Cici drove back to the workshop. When they came back, they heard Drifter sobbing so hard, he could barely breathe. Maxi went to pull the blue tarp covering Drifter, and what he saw caused Maxi to override his usual arrogant and cocky personality. "Drifter, what happened?" Asked Maxi. "I-I-I-I'm going to the scrap-p-p-hea-p", Drifter sobbed. "What?" "No"! "He can't do that, he loves you"! Maxi exclaimed. "I-I-I-know, so why would he do this to me?" Drifter asked. It was at this point that Drifter's speech became incomprehensible. Maxi put his wings around Drifter, and Drifter reciprocated. 

Marsha and Mr. Carburettor then pulled the cars sans Drifter aside to discuss Drifter's fate. She told them that Drifter was going to die, and that they should start organizing ways to remember him. While the humans would be doing most of the harder stuff, the cars could pitch in to help. Cici decided that they could turn Drifter's space into a memorial for him, with flowers, incest, candles, photos, and pieces of technology. "That sounds like a very nice idea, Cici", Mr. Carburettor stated.

Meanwhile, in the workshop, Big Chris had disconnected an important wire in Drifter, the one that connected his AI to the rest of his internals. Upon disconnecting his AI, Drifter's entire body went stiff. If you placed your hand on his eyes or in his mouth, he wouldn't react.

The next day, everyone gathered at the farm together to pay respects to Drifter. "Ladies, gentlemen and others, we are gathered here today in memorial of our beloved Drifter, a Japanese drift car who resided here at Silver Hatch since 2001, and was a great friend and an awesome racecar. It was very unfortunate for all of us when he developed engine complications that proved fatal; we will now welcome Mr. Carburettor with the eulogy". "Drifter first came to Silver Hatch in 2001. When he first came, he was very scared, and could barely speak English. However, he learnt English quickly, though through the power of Tin Top. For 19 years, a lot at Silver Hatch has changed. Tin Top has been converted to electric power, as has Roary. We were once being filmed for a TV show in which Roary was the main character, now we're very quiet. However, what we never had to do on the show was say goodbye to any car. It is very unfortunate that we now must say goodbye to a bright, smart, gentle and kind racer; dust to dust, for richer or for poorer, in sickness or in health; amen". Marsha then stood up. "You may now place your flowers on Drifter's body". And thus, Roary, Maxi, Cici, Tin Top, Big Chris, Marsha, Carbie, Flash, Molecom and all the others placed flowers and incest on Drifter's body, which was covered in a white sheet before the truck took Drifter away.

Over the course of the next few days, there was a somber atmosphere at Silver Hatch. The cars didn't race, or even leave the workshop. Maxi would often sob constantly, with Roary, Cici and Tin Top being vulnerable to tears as well. Big Chris rarely left the workshop, and Marsha rarely showed up. All was desolate until one night, when Roary heard a voice. It was soft, and had a Japanese accent. "Roary, Roary, please don't cry, it's OK". "Drifter? I thought you were dead", Roary remarked. "I am, but I'm still here, my spirit will remain here forever". "Drifter?!" Maxi exclaimed. Soon, Cici and Tin Top woke up. "To all of you, if you need me, just sound out and I'll be here for you".

The bigger the jerkass, the better the tears

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