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Every time I hear a baby crying, I get so angry and want to tell the baby in my loudest voice, "SHUT UP"!!!!!!!!!! Yet when I hear an older child, teenager or adult crying, I feel more sympathetic, especially if the subject is male. Why is this?
Last edited by MaxiSobs (May 5, 2021 3:06 am)
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Hi MaxiSobs, interesting question, while otherwise we would find babies cute, when they cry they are annoying. I think part of the answer would be that they don't have a social consciousness yet, therefore they can't be comforted like an older child.
This made me remember, one day a friend (F) asked me to go with her buy some stuff she needed for her job, we went walking downtown and at some point, her daughter (a really cute girl between 7-10 years) started crying because she was tired and hungry. One thing I found extremely sweet was that when she started to cry, big, thick tears started to roll down her cheeks unchecked and her mother just kept walking, while I knelt in front of her (the child) and told her we were almost done and would soon go back to oir workplace so she could have lunch and I wiped her tears from her cheeks, she made the sweetest smile when I did that, I immediately thought, wow, this girl is already aware that this is a comfort gesture and she liked it. I never thought a pre-teen would consciously like having her tears wiped. Her mother also was looking at me when she noticed we stood behind, she stopped to see what was happening. She became a lot warmer with me (we were already friends) when she saw I was comforting her daughter. She told me I was a very sweet guy.
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Amans lacrimae wrote:
Hi MaxiSobs, interesting question, while otherwise we would find babies cute, when they cry they are annoying. I think part of the answer would be that they don't have a social consciousness yet, therefore they can't be comforted like an older child.
This made me remember, one day a friend (F) asked me to go with her buy some stuff she needed for her job, we went walking downtown and at some point, her daughter (a really cute girl between 7-10 years) started crying because she was tired and hungry. One thing I found extremely sweet was that when she started to cry, big, thick tears started to roll down her cheeks unchecked and her mother just kept walking, while I knelt in front of her (the child) and told her we were almost done and would soon go back to oir workplace so she could have lunch and I wiped her tears from her cheeks, she made the sweetest smile when I did that, I immediately thought, wow, this girl is already aware that this is a comfort gesture and she liked it. I never thought a pre-teen would consciously like having her tears wiped. Her mother also was looking at me when she noticed we stood behind, she stopped to see what was happening. She became a lot warmer with me (we were already friends) when she saw I was comforting her daughter. She told me I was a very sweet guy.
That was a really sweet gesture. Any kid I know would have loved that.
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I suspect one reason crying babies are annoying is that the sound of a crying baby automatically sets up the "Gotta take care of child NOW!" instinct -- plus, crying babies' pitch is right in that "nails on chalkboard" area.
That said, how annoying the sound of a baby crying is for me depends a lot on *why* said baby is crying. If it's "I'm tired/fussy", it's a whiny cry that is really irritating. If it's an "I'm in pain" cry I tend to be more sympathetic. And if it's an "I've got colic" cry, better hope you have earplugs available, because that kind of crying goes on, and on, and ON. . . .
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I don't have kids myself, but I've been told by many people who do have children that if it's your own baby who's crying, it's not as annoying as it would be with a baby that is not your own.