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April 27, 2012 3:50 am  #21

Re: Thank You all

I guess it's emotions that I feel in my stomach... the same kind of stomach feeling can happen if I have a crush on a guy who flirts with me... no crying necessary!  The arousal comes around the same time as the feelings, I think, or possibly a moment later.  I think there is some evolutionary reason why men are generally more aroused by visual stimuli (the caveman wanted a healthy, fertile-looking woman to bear his offspring) and why women are generally more aroused by emotional stimuli (she wanted loyalty in her caveman so that he'd stick around and protect her and their offspring for a long time to come).  I'm not totally sure, but I think there's some theory along those lines out there.

I used to say it was the feeling empathy "itself" that causes my turn-on, but now I'm not so sure, because so many women who identify as straight on this forum enjoy both male and female crying.  Yet I can't get into female crying and surely I must feel empathy for both genders!  So I obviously require a "crush-like" dynamic for my stomach to lurch in that way (as described above), and a crush feeling is something I simply can't get from a women.  And when it comes to crying, without my stomach getting involved with it, there is no arousal involved.  Interesting!  I had never thought of it quite that way before.  But outside of my crying fetish, yes, I can get turned on by generically stimulating thoughts and actions that don't involve my feelings... like, the 'normal' sex stuff... but having feelings involved too always makes it even better...

Do men not feel anything in their stomach when they get a crush?  Butterflies, perhaps?  But I guess, Tearhunter, you don't experience both butterflies and being turned-on at the same time?  Or you do experience that, but just never with the crying fetish?

Last edited by woundedpuppy (April 27, 2012 3:55 am)


April 27, 2012 7:01 am  #22

Re: Thank You all

I compare the actual physical sensation of the stomach flip to the feeling of "losing your stomach" like on a rollercoaster or when you drive fast over a small hill. "Butterflies" isn't INaccurate, but it's not quite intense enough to describe the flip for me. And the flip is unique to my fetishes... I don't think I've ever experienced quite the same feeling while flirting.

To answer some of the earlier questions... no, I don't think I could ever orgasm because of the flip. For me at least, the flip is more akin to foreplay. However, I completely confuse myself with the whole fetish because although the flip is absolutely-positively-definitely a form of arousal (the "juices get flowing," as tearhunter put it), my fetish is largely emotions-based and I get the most pleasure out of comforting, vulnerability, emotional intimacy and all that. I wouldn't want it to lead to sex. The whole experience of comforting a crying guy is a sort of emotional sex, for me.

I'm not sure if giving a specific example is getting too detailed, so if it is, mods, please do let me know! But... a few years ago (and I posted an obs about this on the old forum) I comforted a crying guy for TWO HOURS. Haven't had an experience like that since, and it's burned into my memory (in a v-e-r-y good way.) During the experience, my mind and body had two separate reactions. My body went into full "arousal" mode and well, the juices were flowing. But I barely noticed it because my mind went into full "comforting" mode and all of my focus was on soothing the guy, not on pursuing the physical arousal. It wasn't until the incident was over and I took a moment to actually pay attention to myself (instead of to the guy) that I realized how intensely my body had reacted.

So, huh. What do you do with that? Ha. This really is a strange fetish that we have, isn't it?


April 27, 2012 2:55 pm  #23

Re: Thank You all

This thread is really getting to the heart of the matter, isn't it!!  I really do relate to the "emotional sex" angle.  The experience would be complete for me without any sex at all (although I'll admit I do want some hugging and even cuddling as well) if I have spent sufficient time emotionally (although I have never actually had a "sufficient" crying experience -- 2 hours sounds like absolute heaven!!) 

Although I do operate from a place of mental interest as well, I have wondered to myself if I could accidentally reach the big "O" with a crying guy if the crying went on for long enough and was intense enough... without experience, I'll probably never know... but I'm willing to take that risk. ;)

My new theory on non-bisexual women liking women crying is that it's either the 'reflection' of oneself that is appealing (seeing and hearing another woman cry is a bit like seeing yourself cry, especially if they cry similar to you, and some people are turned on by their own tears) or the comforting role for its own sake (as I think some people have already pointed out), or possibly the actual physical crying itself as something of purely physical interest.  This thread has been an eye-opener for me as I thought I enjoyed comforting for its own sake, but I guess I don't.  Obviously, I enjoy comforting as a type of male-female bonding "excuse".  I don't mean to sound cruel with that, as I'd gladly comfort a female in need any day (honestly), but I guess I must find something romantic (or downright sexual) about comforting a vulnerable guy.  I guess I had thought of my stomach lurch/flip as just the most intense (and sudden) form of butterflies in my repertoire of butterfly-type feelings, but I don't really know what to call it anymore... it is a rollercoaster + arousal feeling, that's all I know... I relate SO much to what you all are saying... I figure in me that it's ultimately driven by emotions, though... that emotions cause the arousal (caveman/cavegirl example from above, except that my wiring is completely crossed, and instead of wanting to be protected by a man, I want to protect HIM!!!)

Is anyone out there wired like me?

Last edited by woundedpuppy (April 27, 2012 4:45 pm)


April 27, 2012 6:15 pm  #24

Re: Thank You all

YES!! I'm wired like that... what you said about wanting to protect a man instead of being protected by him... gahhhhhh yes. I want to "take care of" my man... not necessarily with cooking/cleaning/house-wifey stuff (I have a bit of a feminist streak in me), but with emotional things.


April 27, 2012 9:26 pm  #25

Re: Thank You all

I'm with ya on that... I hate all the cooking and cleaning and that sort of thing!  Though some people do enjoy those aspects as well (unfortunately for my hubby, I'm not one of those people!) ;)

seriously wrote:

YES!! I'm wired like that... what you said about wanting to protect a man instead of being protected by him... gahhhhhh yes. I want to "take care of" my man... not necessarily with cooking/cleaning/house-wifey stuff (I have a bit of a feminist streak in me), but with emotional things.


April 27, 2012 9:28 pm  #26

Re: Thank You all

As Woundedpuppy said - yes I think we are getting to heart of things here - somehow I wondering if we have all been holding back a bit - hiding the sexual undertones of our fetish and how it hits in places that nothing else does. Little concerned we've hijacked SomeoneG1's welcome to the forum mind you - sorry!   

Reading your open and honest comments is amazing - it actually makes me a little envyous as it's clear female arousal and orgasm is a truely wonderful thing - a lot more complex than the male version - at least based on my experience - ours is still good though!

Woundedpuppy - no I don't experience butterflies at the same time as being turned. Butterflies for me are linked with apprehension or nerves, it's never associated with arousal. The 'stomach-flig' (love that name for it by the way) is something I don't get - kind if wish I did after reading all your posts. Arousal ignoring the obvious area for a second makes me feel 'live' - tingling all over - jumpy - warm inside - if that makes sense. But, no specific area of the body - with one exception. Is it because female sexual organs are internal that it effects you this way?

Other things turn me on besides female crying and tears which result in things getting pretty hard downstairs but watching a stunning girl cry with unchecked tears streaming down her face makes things go to another level. The erection I experience is incredible - it truely is as solid as a rock - I'm hyper senstive to touch and have all the feelings noted above. I've been lucky enough to make love to my wife while she has been crying - to date the most erotic experience ever! The erection I experienced was mind blowing - I could feel everything - being inside a woman while she is crying, sobbing a little - you feel those gasps from inside. The resulting orgasm was epic - I completely exploded. It must have been good for my wife as she orgasmed immediately after. Her orgasm actually increased her crying and as tears rolled between her breasts - that sight alone - caused me to explode for a second time (not east for a guy).

Obviously the above is rare (very rare unfortunately) - watching a video of an attractice female crying really turns me on which I need to relive not always with the help of woman! The resulting orgasms are equally as powerful - much more than any other sexual stimulation. Which I guess although different means I'm wired similar to you girls.

Seriously - one question (open to all of course); you say you get turned on to the point that the "juices are flowing" but you don't want it to lead to sex. If it did (with a guy or by yourself), do you think it would result in a quicker more intense orgasm ? Personally getting to the equivalent level of arousal (erection) I would be very frustrating not to satisfy it with some form of sexual activity.

Hope all this is not getting to descriptive - it's an amazing interesting topic !


April 27, 2012 10:03 pm  #27

Re: Thank You all

Could it just be the female G-spot we're all talking about?  It must be somewhere in the general vicinity of the stomach.  It does feel like a dip in the stomach, a roller coaster dip, some sort of wonderful, exhilarating punch in the gut.  If there's no name out there for this (either medical or slang), then there sure as heck should be!!!!

Last edited by woundedpuppy (April 27, 2012 10:04 pm)


April 27, 2012 10:37 pm  #28

Re: Thank You all

I'm definitely wired like that, woundedpuppy. When I fantasize about men crying, it's always men that I'm sexually attracted to or that I'd want to have sex with. I've never had sex with a man while he was crying, but I've had sex with my boyfriend after a crying session (a couple hours after), and I definitely had a more intense orgasm more quickly. I remember him being shocked at just how turned on I was; he said he'd never seen/felt me quite that turned on before during sex. The act of masturbation also ties in with my fetish for me; I enjoy fantasizing about crying or employing the use of sound effects and/or nice videos. I feel sometimes that my fetish provides an even more intense arousal for me than regular sex, especially when I share it with my boyfriend, because it combines sexual AND emotional pleasure.

And woundedpuppy, I like what you said about non-bisexual women who like female crying (as I am one). I know that I'm sometimes turned on by the thought of my own crying, and maybe seeing other women cry is a manifestation of my own emotional release? I don't know. I know I'm also just interested in the physical aspect of crying. My fetish definitely started as male-oriented only, but when I started exploring female crying online, I developed an interest in it, sort of as an extension of the fetish I already had (since I was 4 or so). So I really have no idea why I'm so into female crying, which is weird because I'm usually very aware of why I feel certain things. lol. It's a mystery.

It's all just so linked together... physical and emotional arousal. When I have regular sex, I can often separate it into a solely physical thing (except that because I have a boyfriend, our sex is definitely romantic and emotional too... but it has a purely physical aspect). But with the crying fetish, it's all so twisted together. It's a full-body, full-minded experience for me.


April 28, 2012 5:19 pm  #29

Re: Thank You all

Actually, come to think of it, I have never been turned on by a woman crying, but I have been turned on by the sounds of a woman having a really big orgasm a few times.  I guess I've thought to myself, wow, that must feel so good... and then it's almost like it's contagious and I've ended up feeling good too!  Hmm, too bad our crying fetish wasn't contagious... I would like to think more people could ride this rollercoaster we feel!!!  Instead, they're just crying and feeling miserable, comforting someone else and just wishing the whole thing would end quickly, and wiping tears while wishing no more would ever fall.  Such a waste!!!


April 28, 2012 6:21 pm  #30

Re: Thank You all

I'm going to jump in here, as I haven't in a while, and say that I hadn't really noticed the "stomach flip" until it was brought up here. I don't really get a huge "flip", but I do get butterflies. I guess it is a sort of nervous reaction for me, as all the conflicting reactions and emotions come into play, and I also am nervous that I'll give myself away somehow. I have to be careful not to let my heart beat too fast if my boyfriend's head is on my chest. It's more like a full-torso tension.
The other complicating factor is that I can't (or haven't, rather) have orgasms from regular intercourse, only from manual stimulation. Which is a bummer. I still enjoy it, but I can't really "get there." Similarly, I don't think I could ever reach it just from comforting. At the time I have all the patience in the world and want it to last forever, but I never really get beyond that initial turned-on feeling. In the moment, it's not frustrating, but when I'm by myself later and thinking back on it, I have to "do" something with it, or else it's just a tease. I don't think I explained that very well....

It is such a secret place, the land of tears.
-- Antoine de Saint Exupery, "The Little Prince"

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