I have never been depressed, since I found out I loved tears, I thought it was natural, and when I found out it was a fetish, I just thought everybody has one, so I didn’t give it too much importance, by the way, what is your mother tongue?

Just trying to get to know you better (and only if you feel comfortable, I would like to ask you basic questions:
By the way, welcome to this site, hope we are able to fulfill your needs.

How often do you cry (average):

How intense do you cry:

Reaction to tears:

How long does your average crying fit last:

Cry alone, someone you trust, don’t mind crying in public:

Do you like to cry:

Do you like to be comforted when crying, how:

Now I can see why this negative feeling (I am not trying to substitute a psychologist, nor am I one), you say you feel uncomfortable when someone cries, therefore you feel uncomfortable crying in front of others. Fact: crying is a natural response of the body to strong emotions, both positive and negative, if you feel extremely happy it may be expressed with tears, if you are extremely sad, it is expressed with tears, I can go on with other feelings that brings tears, but I guess you get the point here.

So, have that in mind when you witness someone crying, you may be able to identify the source of the tears, that way you can either be empathetic, or at least not uncomfortable. Same goes if you embrace your feelings, you think people feel uncomfortable when you cry, as you can see, here we are at least 500 people from all over the world who are either comforters or be comforted, I could tell you specific ones that I have become close to, but that’s not needed. If you know the source of your tears and you have someone special you trust (could be a brother, sister, close friend), be sure that if you cry in front of that person, you will not make them uncomfortable.

I have a friend who proactively looks for me whenever she cries, she says she loves my hugs, and I have noticed her positive reaction when I wipe her tears.

Cryinglover wrote:

I know, but I'm a very closed person, and I rarely show my emotions. I suppose most people who know me would say I'm a very cold person.

truffle wrote:

I worked through it by opening up to my family members and talking to people I trusted first. I try to make my relationship as normal as possible.

How did they react when you told them?My mom is very conservative, if I told her that she would kick me out of the house

You could say the same about me, I am extremely reserved, I rarely show my feelings, that being said, I fully trust my wife, and as a marriage, I am there for her when she needs me as she is there for me when I need her, we both have cried in front of each other without being judged, that always eases the burden we may have, simple gestures are more than enough, a hug, wiping the other’s tears, kissing her tears, that lets us know we will always be there for each other.

I don’t expect you to cry at the drop of a hat or in front of anyone, but there is always someone out there that is unconditional for you, someone who will hug you when you need it and without even asking for it, that person will know if you need a hug or your tears wiped, or simply listen to you.

One more question, when you cry, do you allow your tears to fall unchecked?

Last edited by Amans lacrimae (January 31, 2019 1:15 pm)

Cryinglover wrote:

How often do you cry (average):
Maybe once in a month
Reaction to tears:
When someone cries, I feel uncombortable and I don't know what to say. It doesn't turn me on. Just watching videos and thinking about crying turns me on
How long does your average crying fit last:
10-30 minutes

Cry alone, someone you trust, don’t mind crying in public:
Aloneee always
Do you like to cry:
Yees, because I feel better after crying, I evoke negative emotions from myself
Do you like to be comforted when crying, how:
No, I don't like to cry in front of people, I feel poor and I don't want to other people feel uncombortable like me when someone cries.. A lot of people don't like if someone cries in front of them

Can you see how you are putting it all together? It just needs to become conscious, for a girl your age, your crying frequency is below average according to the German Society of Ophthalmology (https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/6334107/Women-cry-more-than-men-and-for-longer-study-finds.html) and you perfectly fit the poll from Cosmopolitan (https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/a3272/how-much-do-you-cry/)

Second, you say you feel uncomfortable if someone is crying in front of you, about this, I am not sure if you haven’t seen enough people crying, or you can start teaching your brain how to respond in a crying situation, for example, the first few times someone cried in front of me, my heart started beating fast and I was paralyzed, eventually, as I got used and familiarized with the situation, I got the confidence to place my hand on the person’s shoulder, then on the shoulder blades, then give a hug and finally wipe the tears from the person’s face.

Third, you reflect how you feel and project it to others, assuming that if you feel uncomfortable if someone cries, then if you cry, you think that others will also feel uncomfortable, but as you can see here, all of us are more than happy to take care of a crying person.

Fourth, you mention feeling better after crying, therefore you like to cry, and you confirmed it by letting your tears to fall unchecked, that means you acknowledge your feelings, and at least don’t have issues with them.

Based on this, the only “problem” I see is the interaction with people crying, therefore, it is reflected on how you feel about crying in general (including getting turned on).

Last edited by Amans lacrimae (January 31, 2019 9:32 pm)