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May 15, 2017 9:22 pm  #1


Violence, hurt yourself

Does somebody know the reaction of violence, shouting, getting angry to prevent the coming tears? Maybe running very fast, getting exhausted or even hurting  yourself by hitting something? Maybe the pain  you feel when hurting yourself allows the tears to flow because there is a visible reason, it is like permission, not only the inner pain you can't explain, make it reasonable. Sorry, maybe I am too personal again and will delete this post, Just let it sit here until tomorrow...

 

May 16, 2017 6:31 am  #2


Re: Violence, hurt yourself

Quite a few posts on here get personal - your post is a good one and an interesting question.

I have heard of this but I've always thought of it as a way for the person to distract themselves from the emotions they are feeling to prevent themselves from crying. Perhaps a bit stereotypical but this can be seen as a common male reaction - although I have witnessed it in females.

Is this something you are finding yourself doing?

We are very complex machines and we don't always react the way we think we should nor do we react the same way every time. Depending on what's going on in our lives we can get down, emotional and subdued or we can get angry and animated.

I think knowing what's going on deep down is the key to understanding how people react - not an easy task.

If this is something that's worrying you you know you can talk here - if you'd rather you can always PM me.

 

May 16, 2017 6:41 am  #3


Re: Violence, hurt yourself

Sorry, didn't reply to the second part of your post. When typing on the phone I can't see the original post.

You talk about the pain then giving the person permission to cry. Is this after the anger subsides? I've seen this a lot but it's not the physical pain generally that causes the tears in my experience.

I've seen people, in the main females, get angry and then they don't know where to channel that anger - they appear not to know what to do with themselves - in that moment the emotions take hold again and crying can break through. Sometimes this can happen just after they have done something big, thrown a mug across the room, hit something - it's as if that action reduced the anger enough to allow emotions to come to the surface.

Hope that makes sense - let me know if I'm understanding your post correctly.

 

May 17, 2017 1:00 am  #4


Re: Violence, hurt yourself

I know the experience of being frustrated and angry over something but, instead of crying over it immediately, I let it fester in my mind for weeks. In these cases I found myself crying immediately after an intense workout, usually just after running. Pain has never had anything to do with it though, just the exertion. 


I'm a woman and I think women are beautiful when they cry.
 

May 17, 2017 6:30 am  #5


Re: Violence, hurt yourself

A screaming match always results in me crying afterwards, but i really hate letting myself lose control like that and i dont even want to get worked up and scream as it really doesnt solve any problems or make me feel better. Work out or running does the opposite if im stressed out and near tears, takes the edge of it and i can move on more clear minded. I dont cry from pain either so in my case neither of these scenarios "allows" me to cry. 

 

May 17, 2017 1:13 pm  #6


Re: Violence, hurt yourself

I don't cry from pain either. It is more like so much desperation that I hurt myself because I am in such a violent temper. Running through dorny bushes and having scratches afterwards or squeezing a glass and getting cut at the shards.
If ever possible I try to prevent crying at all doing anything because my crying is violent like tearhunter mentioned in his other thread. Violent crying is not acceptable for me in front of others. I scare the shit out of them and I don't feel better afterwards

     Thread Starter
 

May 17, 2017 5:44 pm  #7


Re: Violence, hurt yourself

flatter wrote:

I don't cry from pain either. It is more like so much desperation that I hurt myself because I am in such a violent temper. Running through dorny bushes and having scratches afterwards or squeezing a glass and getting cut at the shards.
If ever possible I try to prevent crying at all doing anything because my crying is violent like tearhunter mentioned in his other thread. Violent crying is not acceptable for me in front of others. I scare the shit out of them and I don't feel better afterwards

I feel ya! Will at any cost prevent myself from crying violently in front of others as fore the same reasons
 

 

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