You are not logged in. Would you like to login or register?



December 26, 2018 1:52 pm  #1


I registered at last

Hi, everybody! I've been lurking on this forum for more than a year now and I guess it was time for me to officially introduce myself.
I'm 21 years old and female, I live in the UK, but I have been born and raised in Eastern Europe. I have a love-hate relationship with my fetish and I partially didn't register for as long as I did because of the shame I've felt for the fetish and how hard it has been to talk about it. But I believe it will help me to talk to you all and come to terms with myself.
And now more about the type of crying I like: it's weird because I see myself as a straight female, but I'm mainly attracted to females crying myself. What I really like the most is loud sobbing that goes on for a fairly long time. I also enjoy tears and specifically when they drip off onto clothing, a pillow or any surface. I like how when someone is sobbing hard their back trembles. When I've been looking at this forum, I also developed a  interest for the lip curl. Basically, when someone is crying really hard, I like it. I'm much less picky in real life than the stuff I look on the internet, I also enjoy male crying when it's face to face. I think if I find the right clips, I'll like it on the internet too, but it's hard to find a man crying loudly and continuously and it's not fake. Generally, like many people here I like the comforting aspect, although I haven't had many opportunities for that in life.
When it comes to my own crying, I've always felt ashamed to show vulnerability, so I do it alone whenever possible. The only person I have cried in front since my childhood is my boyfriend, but I still prefer to hold myself together whenever possible. I used to almost never cry as a teenager, but due to loneliness, life changes and so on, I find it very easy to cry in the last 2 or 3 years and do it probably once every few weeks. When I cry, I do it silently, and if there's someone to see me cry, I try not to lip curl and hide my face, but when I'm alone I let my tears fall unchecked, sob quietly, some times my lip curls and my chin sometimes trembles. If it goes on for long enough, my tears roll down my neck.
Abd ok, that's wnough for now. If some observations come to mind, I'll post them here.

 

December 26, 2018 2:01 pm  #2


Re: I registered at last

Welcome Laurie, I’m glad you decided to join, I’m sure you’ll find support and understanding here, you can feel like home in this community. By the way, your description of your own crying is beautiful.

 

December 26, 2018 2:48 pm  #3


Re: I registered at last

Thank you, I really cry very easily these days, so I'm sure there will be more of that in the months to come. 😄

     Thread Starter
 

December 26, 2018 3:10 pm  #4


Re: I registered at last

I am eager to reading your obs, by the way, you mention crying in front of your boyfriend, yet, you’d rather not, does he comfort you when you cry in front of him? Do you allow your tears to fall in front of him?

 

December 26, 2018 3:28 pm  #5


Re: I registered at last

The first time I cried in front of him, I still didn't know I had this fetish, I discovered it only about a year ago. We were a young couple at the time and I was playing tough in front of him, and we were both about to go on summer break (as we're university students). I wasn't going to see him for months so I couldn't hold it back and when he started saying bye, I lost it and started crying, tears running down and trying not to sob. He took a tissue and started wiping my tears, but I was very embarrassed as I wanted not to appear overly emotional to him and told him not to baby me around and that I'm fine. I think if I knew about my fetish back then, I would have let him do it. These days, when I cry, he usually comes to hug me in bed and I lie on my side and burry my face in his chest, usually leaving tear stains on the pillow. I usually try to hide myself, but I think I've been getting more and more comfortable with him and maybe soon I'll be able to look at him while I cry. He's a usually emotional person but he's only cried in front of me once (unfortunatelly for me). He's a very affectionate person and tries to talk me through the problems and doesn't leave my side until I'm feeling better.

     Thread Starter
 

December 26, 2018 4:02 pm  #6


Re: I registered at last

Nice start, seems he is very kind and affectionate, for him to have the initiative to wipe your tears so early in the relationship. So, I know it can be embarrassing to cry in front of something, specially the first time, did you like the feeling (or the fact, even if secretly) that he wiped your tears? How did he react when you told him to stop?

I find kind of weird that the first time you cried in front of him you allowed him to see your tear streaked face and now that you have been with him longer, you hide your face from him.

Well, hope to read from you soon, enjoy the holidays.

Last edited by Amans lacrimae (December 26, 2018 4:03 pm)

 

December 26, 2018 4:05 pm  #7


Re: I registered at last

Welcome! You may be quite the rarity. There are other straight women here who like women crying, but you might be the only one that prefers it. Do you get sexually aroused by women crying?


Ugly crying is pretty crying
 

December 26, 2018 4:20 pm  #8


Re: I registered at last

Yes, I do, which is exactly why this fetish has been so confusing for me. My problem is that I've never climaxed to anything that is not related to the fetish, so this leaves me confused whether I can have a normal sexual life. I have gotten aroused by normal sexual stuff, but not to that extent. I know life is long and I'll probably figure myself out. I've read that arousal comes from subconscious associations in our minds, and that sometimes people develop fetishes like that, if a partner does something or dresses a certain way during sexual activity, the person starts finding that thing or behavior arousing. So I'm currently trying to build these associations in my mind for vanilla stuff, and hopefully I can teach myself to like it. I don't think I would mind having that kink otherwise, because it's fairly harmless. 

     Thread Starter
 

December 26, 2018 6:36 pm  #9


Re: I registered at last

My problem is that I've never climaxed to anything that is not related to the fetish, so this leaves me confused whether I can have a normal sexual life.

That's interesting. Has it caused a problem with sex with your partners? I personally have to fantasize about crying, including my wife's own crying, during sex with her. Can you tell us about how your fetish started?


Ugly crying is pretty crying
 

December 26, 2018 8:17 pm  #10


Re: I registered at last

Sure. I really didn't know I had a fetish until I was 19 years old. I knew I felt very awkward for the most part when someone was crying around me. Most of my observations have been with my mother and grandmother. Usually I associated their crying with trouble for me, because when it happened it was either because me or someone else in the family has pushed them over the edge and I was afraid when it happened. When I was 18 to 19 I saw some girl at school hugging another girl and comforting her while she was crying and I remember I thought it was very sweet and thought how I'm always too awkward to comfort anybody. When my best friend was tearing up when we were graduating, I thought I'd try it and gave her a hug and it kind of felt nice to not be so awkward and inadequate when someone was crying for once. Since then I started getting dreams of my friend or other random girls crying and I felt something in the dreams, but I didn't really figure out what that feeling was.
Then I went away from home, went to university and I met my first boyfriend. It was not a proper relationship by any standard, the guy barely cared about me but I cared about him. He was a generous partner in bed, but it didn't do much for me. I felt arousal when we were kissing but I never got to an orgasm with him. Our relationship didn't last long, then I got together with my second boyfriend, and again, sex was not working out for me. It made me feel an emotional connection and I enjoy pleasing him, but I don't orgasm.
Then the way I found out about my fetish was kind of silly. I was playing a computer game, and in the game there would occassionally be some run down villages, and when you pass through them, there are sometimes women sitting near the roadside crying. The sound effect was pretty over the top and terrible, but I'd hear crying and I would go around and explore, trying to find the crying woman. By that point I realized I was feeling some weird interest for the crying women. So I was still not sure why but decided to go on youtube and look for crying sound effects and videos. I started realizing then there was some sexual aspect to it for me and then I successfully masturbated for the first time. Since then I have been noticing crying and my body has been reacting to it way more than before.
So I do feel this fetish is messing with my personal life a bit, because I want a fulfilling sexual experience with my boyfriend. He really almost never cries and if he did, I don't think he'd necessarily be comfortable with me behaving in a sexual way, so I need to find a way around this.
I have felt arousal at kissing and just random affectionate things, so I hope I can find a way to seperate this kink from sexual experiences in my mind.

     Thread Starter
 

Board footera

 

Powered by Boardhost. Create a Free Forum