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August 5, 2019 9:52 pm  #11


Re: First time

The first time my girlfriend saw me cry, we had been together for four months or so. I had just gotten into a fight (really just me receiving a written/verbal beatdown) with one of my exes, to whom I have a great deal of emotional attachment. When I read what my ex wrote to me, I was taken off guard, and their words hit me really hard. I started sobbing really hard--so hard that I found it hard to talk.

My girlfriend hugged me, and just held me in her arms and let me cry for as long as I needed. I was probably shaking a great deal, since my sobbing was so intense, and I know I got plenty of tears and whatnot on my girlfriend's shirt sleeve. She was okay with it, though I was embarrassed. She said that she usually doesn't know how to respond when people cry like that in front of her, but I told her that she did plenty, and that she was helpful. When she left my apartment that evening, she messaged me to tell me to be strong, and that she loved me. That was the first time she told me she loved me without me saying I loved her first, so that meant a great deal to me. I'm still with her to this day, and I hope to always be with her.

 

August 6, 2019 2:25 am  #12


Re: First time

Dacrypticphile wrote:

The first time my girlfriend saw me cry, we had been together for four months or so. I had just gotten into a fight (really just me receiving a written/verbal beatdown) with one of my exes, to whom I have a great deal of emotional attachment. When I read what my ex wrote to me, I was taken off guard, and their words hit me really hard. I started sobbing really hard--so hard that I found it hard to talk.

My girlfriend hugged me, and just held me in her arms and let me cry for as long as I needed. I was probably shaking a great deal, since my sobbing was so intense, and I know I got plenty of tears and whatnot on my girlfriend's shirt sleeve. She was okay with it, though I was embarrassed. She said that she usually doesn't know how to respond when people cry like that in front of her, but I told her that she did plenty, and that she was helpful. When she left my apartment that evening, she messaged me to tell me to be strong, and that she loved me. That was the first time she told me she loved me without me saying I loved her first, so that meant a great deal to me. I'm still with her to this day, and I hope to always be with her.

Have you seen her cry? Did she wipe or kiss your tears?

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August 6, 2019 2:53 am  #13


Re: First time

Amans lacrimae wrote:

Have you seen her cry? Did she wipe or kiss your tears?

Nah, I've never seen her cry. She's not much of a crier, and she didn't wipe my tears. I don't like kissing, so I wouldn't want her to kiss my tears even if that were a thing that would happen, but she didn't wipe them either. She just held me as I sobbed, as I described.

 

August 6, 2019 7:31 am  #14


Re: First time

Wow, I am surprised that in such a long time she hasn't cried in front of you. Also, girls seem to be more sensitive and tend to comfort more phisically than men, I find it rare that she hasn't wiped your tears, considering you cry at the drop of a hat.

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August 6, 2019 12:38 pm  #15


Re: First time

Amans lacrimae wrote:

I am surprised he readily cried in front of you, even allowed you to wipe his tears, dos wiping His tears Made him sob harder? Like you, I also have trouble crying in front of somebody I haven't cried before.

When you cried in front of him, he took care of you like a pro, seems he was used to, he held you in his arms and kissed your tears, how did you feel when he did? (At least he cried in front of you sooner than you did, guess that made you feel more comfortable?).

Have a wonderful weekend, missed you on the site.

Wiping his tears didn't make him sob harder that time - he only sobbed briefly, and after that he was just facing me with tears on his cheeks. Wiping them was intensely intimate for both of us. He had no trace of embarrassment or discomfort about crying in front of me and never has since.

When he held me in my arms when I cried that first time, I felt safe and comforted. I wasn't embarrassed at all, just relieved that I was finally crying with him.

 

August 6, 2019 1:13 pm  #16


Re: First time

carrotcake wrote:

Wiping his tears didn't make him sob harder that time - he only sobbed briefly, and after that he was just facing me with tears on his cheeks. Wiping them was intensely intimate for both of us. He had no trace of embarrassment or discomfort about crying in front of me and never has since.

When he held me in my arms when I cried that first time, I felt safe and comforted. I wasn't embarrassed at all, just relieved that I was finally crying with him.

Seems that both of you fully trusted and cared for each other in order to allow tears to be wiped or kissed. I can assume that him kissing your tears the first time you cried in front of him must have also been very special for both of you, even though you were already used have your tears taken care of. Congrats for finding such a wonderful man.

Last edited by Amans lacrimae (August 6, 2019 1:29 pm)

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August 8, 2019 6:54 pm  #17


Re: First time

Amans lacrimae wrote:

Wow, I find it interesting how one changes the way one cries. Seems you were comfortable crying in front of others, doesn't matter if male or female, also both or you cried in front of more than one person (not one on one but in a group), neither or you showed signs of shame or tried to hide it, even though you wiped your tears. Amazing how she hasn't changed the way she cries in all these years.

Thank you for sharing.

I guess we all cry freely when we are younger. That said, that was probably one of the last times I cried in front of that many people. It was around that time that I was transitioning from a crybaby to someone who doesn't cry that often. And while my friend hasn't changed the way she cries (she's always let her tears flow unchecked, much to my delight), she definitely used to cry more frequently as a child than she does now, and I'm one of the very few people she's comfortable crying in front of, unlike in her younger days when she'd just let her tears flow without bothering about who saw.


Tears of joy are beautiful.
 

August 9, 2019 8:10 pm  #18


Re: First time

I'm going to describe the first time i (unexpectedly) cried in front of the last guy i have been in love with. No exaggeration; the hottest guy in college. I've been head over heels in love with him since we started college (we're starting Junior year this October, so i met him almost two years ago). Long story short; when we first met, i was already in a relationship so "something" started going on a year and a half later of us being only friends, this April. We started off as FWB, which started to bug me some time later and i wanted to get into a real relationship with him. I asked him out so we can talk about it, we sat on a bench in a public park and to shorten the story, he wasn't really into being in a relationship at that point. While he was talking about it, i started feeling that i am sure as hell going to cry...i felt this huge pressure and pain in my chest, and also the feeling when you know you're gonna break down to tears as soon as you let out a single world. That happened to me, i excused myself a few times while my voice was breaking before trying to talk normally. He sounded cold saying: "That's okay.''. As i was telling him how i got attached and fell in love in that FWB process, my voice was shaking like a washing machine i swear lol. After a while, we both just got silent and he hugged me; somehow from the side, left side of my face leaning on his chest. I just couldn't hold it in anymore at that point and i broke down into tears. As i wasn't able to figure out how he reacts to tears, especially for acting a bit cold when my voice started trembling, i buried my face in my hands and started sobbing really silently. To my absolutely massive surprise, he grabbed me in a big hug and placed me me to cry on his shoulder. I stopped crying when he hugged me that way. For minutes i was just silent, but i was breathing heavily. And then the beautiful hug has gotten to me and i started sobbing. After just a few seconds i could feel his shirt and neck getting soaked in my tears (because my left eye was on his shirt and my right one on his neck, if it makes sense). He held me even harder, shifting from stroking my back with his right hand to my hair with his left one. The whole time i was just holding his wrist with my right hand, and at one point i put my left hand over my mouth because i was starting to sob louder, and i didn't feel comfortable doing so in a public park. When i started sniffling a lot he offered me a tissue which i accepted. When i moved away from him, i laughed at how he had mascara on his neck and shirt and i took a wet wipe and wiped it away, and then proceeded to wipe the mascara that was smeared all around my eyes. Even though the event that led to me crying was obviously sad, it was literally the most beautiful cry i have ever experienced. And although me and that boy don't talk anymore, i really often recall every second of that memory which will probably stay with me for a long time.

 

August 10, 2019 6:38 am  #19


Re: First time

andjyx wrote:

i started feeling that i am sure as hell going to cry...i felt this huge pressure and pain in my chest, and also the feeling when you know you're gonna break down to tears as soon as you let out a single world. That happened to me, i excused myself a few times while my voice was breaking before trying to talk normally. my voice was shaking like a washing machine i swear lol.

After a while, we both just got silent and he hugged me; somehow from the side, left side of my face leaning on his chest. I just couldn't hold it in anymore at that point and i broke down into tears. As i wasn't able to figure out how he reacts to tears, especially for acting a bit cold when my voice started trembling, i buried my face in my hands and started sobbing really silently. To my absolutely massive surprise, he grabbed me in a big hug and placed me me to cry on his shoulder. I stopped crying when he hugged me that way. For minutes i was just silent, but i was breathing heavily. And then the beautiful hug has gotten to me and i started sobbing. After just a few seconds i could feel his shirt and neck getting soaked in my tears (because my left eye was on his shirt and my right one on his neck, if it makes sense). He held me even harder, shifting from stroking my back with his right hand to my hair with his left one. The whole time i was just holding his wrist with my right hand, and at one point i put my left hand over my mouth because i was starting to sob louder, and i didn't feel comfortable doing so in a public park. When i started sniffling a lot he offered me a tissue which i accepted. When i moved away from him, i laughed at how he had mascara on his neck and shirt and i took a wet wipe and wiped it away, and then proceeded to wipe the mascara that was smeared all around my eyes. Even though the event that led to me crying was obviously sad, it was literally the most beautiful cry i have ever experienced. And although me and that boy don't talk anymore, i really often recall every second of that memory which will probably stay with me for a long time.

Thanks a lot for sharing, you made me think, as you may have read, most obs talk about the visible part of crying (tears shed, sobbing, wiping tears or allowing them to fall freely), but here you describe the symptoms (if I am allowed to use the word for this) that precedes crying (pressure and pain on chest, feeling of about to dissolve in tears, breaking and shaking voice), I started to think: are the symptoms the same for male and female? Do they change with age?

When you describe him acting cold and you starting to cry, the detail of hiding your face in your hands sobbing, made me feel like I need to hug you tightly, let you know that you can cry unashamedly and tenderly wipe your tears. You add the detail that after a few seconds his shirt and neck were soaked by your tears, do you usually shed that many tears, do they run down your face in a single stream or do they form multiple streaks?

You mention this incident happened in a public park, did you notice bystanders, if yes, how did they react? Also, you noticed mascara on his shirt, and obviously, on your face, did you notice mascara stained tears running down your face? Same happened with my wife, then girlfriend, she had my shirt stained with mascara.https://cryinglovers.boardhost.com/viewtopic.php?id=1597

I am glad this is the most memorable (and maybe pleasant?) comfort while crying you ever had. Have you ever had your tears wiped or kissed?

Have a beautiful weekend.

Last edited by Amans lacrimae (August 10, 2019 2:23 pm)

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August 10, 2019 2:56 pm  #20


Re: First time

The thing is that there wasn't much of the visible part on that occasion. As soon as i started quietly sobbing, he grabbed me in his arms and literally all my tears ended on his shirt and neck. Same happened when i cried again a few minutes after, when he teased me about something but i was still upset so i broke down again, he immediately hugged me tightly and in both occasions i have cried on his shoulder literally until the moment i stopped crying completely, so there were no running tears that day.

I do think that the symptoms change with age; i think that we cry more freely as children, never hiding tears or holding it in...and as we get older we tend to hold it in, hide our crying face etc. because we start to feel ashamed of crying without care. Nonetheless, i also think that men are more of "quiet" criers; based on what I've experienced in real life, most of them just bury their faces in their hands and sob silently, and not for too long also, whereas women are more prone to letting their tears fall unchecked while also making crying faces and even sobbing freely.

Haha thanks i guess, that's so sweet! I do love having my tears wiped away and also doing it for other people (preferably males...don't know why, i just feel more compassionate when a male cries). Well i don't cry that often, so when i do, i cry a lot. And they mostly run down in a single stream, they form multiple streaks when i'm literally having a complete meltdown which is thankfully rare.
Honestly, i tried not to pay attention to the people passing by, i was really not too amused with crying in public. But i am sure no one stopped to ask what's wrong and so. And as i mentioned above, i haven't had any tears run down my face as they all ended up on him lol. But i did cry in front of him again, though on that occassion i didn't cry on his shoulder. It was a regular hug (like, my chin was on his shoulder) so the tears that ran down my face ended up on his shirt when they went all the way down. And that time he did wipe my tears and we both smiled (actually, just the right one...he probably didn't realize that i had another tear streak that went from the corner of my left eye down to my lips).

I've had people hug and comfort me while i cry, but his hug was definitely something else. Even though he ended up disappointing me on one occasion, the way he comforted me that day just shows how emotional and compassionate he is, no matter how childish at times. Which is probably why i was so in love with him. And yes, I've had my tears wiped mostly by guys i have been with, and maybe a couple of friends. Actually I've had a guy friend sleep over three months ago and we were laying on my bed on our sides, i broke down because of something that had happened the night before and started sobbing in his chest. When i moved away he gently kissed away my tears which made me feel priceless (my whole face was wet because i cried intensely and for a good 10 minutes). 

P.S i have read the obs you provided a link for and oh God, its one of the most beautiful i have read on this site so far! So amazing that the girl ended up crying without a shame in front of you.

Last edited by andjyx (August 10, 2019 3:06 pm)

 

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