1 of 1- tearhunter
- Godlike
Offline - Registered: July 28, 2011
- Posts: 505
First male observation for a long time...
A colleague at work (male) was talking this morning about a sad event that occurred over the weekend (don't want to be too specific on an open forum) and as he spoke his voice faltered and wobbled with emotion.
I thought he would run for the nearest bathroom but he continued to talk as tears rolled down his cheeks in front of about 4 or 5 people. Continued crying for about 5 minutes - very emotional voice with many of his sentences being cut off with ragged breathing and quiet gasps. Tears allowed to flow unchecked throughout - streaming down the middle of his face and the side of his nose and either dripping off his chin or running into his mouth.
It's been many a years since I've seen a male work colleague cry and I don't think they were as open as this guy was.
Was it wrong that I thought of our female members and how you would have loved to be in my place? Tried to remember as much as possible!
- raindance85
- Unregistered
Re: First male observation for a long time...
That was a great observations. Thanks for sharing tearhunter. 
- woundedpuppy
- Godlike
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- Registered: July 27, 2011
- Posts: 554
Re: First male observation for a long time...
Wow. Thanks, Tearhunter.
- meantangerine
- Great One
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- From: New York
- Registered: July 29, 2011
- Posts: 418
Re: First male observation for a long time...
Awesome observation! Poor guy, I hope everything's okay.
It is such a secret place, the land of tears.
-- Antoine de Saint Exupery, "The Little Prince"
- tearhunter
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Re: First male observation for a long time...
He seams back to his normal self today - at least outwardly. It was the act of telling us about what had happened that made him cry - if he had not said anything there would not have been the tears.
I can completely relate to this as I've felt ok about something, sad but ok but, as soon as I've started to talk about it - the voice falters and the tears flow.
Two things surprised me about this observation (1) he cried openly in front of several mostly male work colleagues, I don't think I could have done that, and (2) the volume of tears that flowed down his face - in the 5 minutes he was crying I'd estimate 15 tears fell from each eye, so about 30ish in total - one every 10 seconds (although some fell simulatenously). His face was visibly wet from crying.
I know that when I cry openly (usually alone or with my wife only) I can shed lots of tears. Some of you have mentioned male partners that appear to shed a fair amount of tears. So, where does this idea that guys don't shed tears come from? I would say my wife can still shed more tears than me when she is very upset but I don't think I'm noticably that far behind her.
Just interested in your thoughts.
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Thread Starter- meantangerine
- Great One
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- From: New York
- Registered: July 29, 2011
- Posts: 418
Re: First male observation for a long time...
I think there's a biological reason for that. Men's tear ducts are bigger/deeper than women's, so they take longer to fill up and spill over.
It is such a secret place, the land of tears.
-- Antoine de Saint Exupery, "The Little Prince"
- tearhunter
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- Posts: 505
Re: First male observation for a long time...
Male tear ducts are supposed to be bigger but that is meant to aid in perventing tears overflowing... found the following bit of information.
Women are biologically wired to shed tears more than men. Under a microscope, cells of female tear glands look different than men's. Also, the male tear duct is larger than the female's, so if a man and a woman both tear up, the woman's tears will spill onto her cheeks quicker. "For men and their ducts, it'd be like having a big fat pipe to drain in a rainstorm," says Louann Brizendine, a neuropsychiatrist at the University of California, San Francisco.
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Thread Starter