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November 17, 2020 6:19 pm  #1


how do you talk about your dacryphilia to non-dacs?

When I talk about it, I have difficulty expressing how it makes me feel, and in turn that makes me feel like I'm coming across like I get off on seeing/hearing a man cry. And the more I try to explain that it's emotional and not erotic attraction, the more I feel like I sound like I'm just protesting too much.
So I tend to feel like the First Rule of Dac Club is you don't talk about Dac Club. (But it's also hard for me to keep my mouth shut sometimes.)

What about y'all? Are you open about it? Are you guarded about it? How do you talk about it? Esp in front of someone who has or may cry in front of you?


Don't mind me, I'm just here to fill my lachrimatory.
 

November 17, 2020 9:22 pm  #2


Re: how do you talk about your dacryphilia to non-dacs?

Two of my bfs have been dacs. They don't know the word for it, but they say they get turned on when they're sad or when they cry. Not sure if it's dac or if it's just seeking out comfort behavior?

They don't know that I am one though because I feel like I'd be made fun of or even making the wrong impression of being sadistic if I say I like seeing their tears lol.

 

November 17, 2020 11:52 pm  #3


Re: how do you talk about your dacryphilia to non-dacs?

Cryo, that's interesting--they were turned on by their own crying?


Don't mind me, I'm just here to fill my lachrimatory.
     Thread Starter
 

November 18, 2020 2:08 am  #4


Re: how do you talk about your dacryphilia to non-dacs?

I'm really guarded about it, I pretty much only tell partners and only after we've been seeing each other a while. I think there's only a couple friends I haven't slept with who know. 

Usually I tell them that I'm attracted to crying, but emphasize that for me it's the opposite of a BDSM crying fetish. That for me it's related to the desire to comfort and care for the person who is crying. Usually I also describe it as a combination of being attracted to the physical act of crying and tears with my broader sexuality of being into taking care of someone who is open and vulnerable. 

Last edited by purposehans (November 18, 2020 2:12 am)

 

November 18, 2020 2:48 am  #5


Re: how do you talk about your dacryphilia to non-dacs?

When I was younger I used to be really careful about hiding it. Then I realized that sharing it is the best way to get what I want from a romantic partner.

I'm in the early stages of a romantic relationship with a guy right now (who I've posted about before a couple of times) and I've tried being subtle about it but he's not taking the hint, so my plan is to literally sit down with him and tell him about it clearly. We're all adults and life is too short to beat around the bush with stuff like this. In my opinion of course.


I'm a woman and I think women are beautiful when they cry.
 

November 18, 2020 5:30 am  #6


Re: how do you talk about your dacryphilia to non-dacs?

I haven't really shared it with anyone except Conn and he's a "dac" (more so than me because he likes actual tears whereas I'm into comforting and being comforted, though I do like having tears run down my face). And as far as I know, he hasn't shared it with anyone else but me, but I guess if either of us was to ever share it with others, it might not be very different from how it went between us, because neither of us knew that the other was a dac until we shared it with each other (you can read about that here).

 

November 18, 2020 7:53 pm  #7


Re: how do you talk about your dacryphilia to non-dacs?

Purposehans, I think that's a great way to describe it!


Don't mind me, I'm just here to fill my lachrimatory.
     Thread Starter
 

November 19, 2020 2:23 am  #8


Re: how do you talk about your dacryphilia to non-dacs?

truffle wrote:

When I was younger I used to be really careful about hiding it. Then I realized that sharing it is the best way to get what I want from a romantic partner.

I'm in the early stages of a romantic relationship with a guy right now (who I've posted about before a couple of times) and I've tried being subtle about it but he's not taking the hint, so my plan is to literally sit down with him and tell him about it clearly. We're all adults and life is too short to beat around the bush with stuff like this. In my opinion of course.

That is true! Once I tell a partner, and they're someone who is comfortable making themselves cry, it usually leads to them wanting to plan watching a sad movie with me. https://cdn.boardhost.com/emoticons/cute.png

 

November 19, 2020 8:40 am  #9


Re: how do you talk about your dacryphilia to non-dacs?

PhoebeOnThePhone wrote:

Cryo, that's interesting--they were turned on by their own crying?

Yes, both said they "get turned on when sad."

One said he gets turned on while he's crying. That was confirmed multiple times by him making moves on me while he was still in tears.
It's also worth noting that he said he also likes making a move when I'm crying. He usually does toward the end.

I wanted to ask more questions when those things were said but I didn't wanna sound creepy or arouse suspicion lol.
Again, not sure if it's dacryphilia or comfort-seeking behavior.

 

November 19, 2020 2:58 pm  #10


Re: how do you talk about your dacryphilia to non-dacs?

I don't talk about my dacryphilia specifically, I may talk about tears or crying, sometimes people surprise me with their answers or physical response, but still, I am extremely reserved with the subject, not even my wife knows about it.

 

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