1 of 1- woundedpuppy
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If you had to choose
If you had to choose between a relationship in which there would be regular sexual activity, or a relationship in which there would be regular crying from your partner yet as far as your private parts went, you could only masturbate (no touching by your partner)... which would you choose? So basically I'm saying, in one situation, you would have regular types of sexual activities, but crying from your partner would be infrequent at best and it wouldn't ever be part of any sexual play when it did occur. In the other situation, there would be crying from your partner on a very regular basis, yet as far as sexual activities went, you would be quite limited (limited to kissing and cuddling type activities) -- no "sex" (regular, oral, manual, etc.) of any kind. But you would be allowed to masturbate anytime you wanted, even if it was during the crying moments, if that was what you liked to do. Or you could always masturbate alone in private after the incident if you wanted. Or you wouldn't have to masturbate at all if that wasn't your thing.
In both situations, you love the person and the person loves you. At the very least, you get along or are compatible. I know there are a thousand different hypotheticals and different factors that could affect the situation... but as a fun (unrealistic) question, which relationship would you choose?
Feel free to explain the reason for your choice, if you like. 
- caircair
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Re: If you had to choose
Having been through both scenarios, I'd prefer the sexual activity with little to no crying. When someone I'm very close to is crying/in pain, I'm more focused on helping them feel better than on the comforting aspect of the crying itself. I prefer in some ways to get my fix thru movies and TV, where I can fantasize about the desired outcome. Too often in real life, the outcome isn't what I would prefer or doesn't conform to my wishes.
"We have our stalking memories, and they will demand their rightful tears."
Anonymous
- PaperThings
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Re: If you had to choose
Er, crying. Kind of personal, I guess, but as someone who has yet to engage in sexual activity and isn't particularly eager to... the crying seems just way lovelier.
- meantangerine
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Re: If you had to choose
I'd pick the sex and get all my crying fixes extracurricularly (is that even a word?). I'd rather have a full, healthy relationship with all the trimmings, and take my chances with the crying. Also, having been with someone who cried a lot, often as a result of worrying about our relationship, I'd worry that the crying would eventually tire us both out and erode our confidence and happiness.
It is such a secret place, the land of tears.
-- Antoine de Saint Exupery, "The Little Prince"
- woundedpuppy
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Re: If you had to choose
The reason for the crying in the relationship was left pretty vague, I suppose. I had just imagined a really easy crier -- like someone who feels their emotions more deeply than others, even if they're a generally happy person overall. And who likes being comforted, of course.
I'll pick the crying relationship. Mind you, if I hadn't included any hugging and kissing, I'd pick the sex one over the crying one, but since I allowed for that particular level of intimacy, I'd be fine with dropping sex from my life and replacing it with crying instead. Especially if we could do the crying stuff lying on a couch or in bed together... you know, just cuddling with our clothes on, talking about all sorts of things, him bursting into tears frequently, me comforting him every time it happened. Maybe there's such a thing as comforting burnout, but since I've never even come close to experiencing that yet, it's a pretty easy choice for me. Unfortunately, I don't find I can get much of a "comforting" fix without an actual live person to comfort (while watching a movie with a comforting scene in it, I'm just a voyeur...) I can get some amount of a "sights and sounds" fix, though, so at least movies aren't completely useless to me!
Last edited by woundedpuppy (November 7, 2012 8:39 pm)
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Thread Starter- woundedpuppy
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Re: If you had to choose
caircair wrote:
Too often in real life, the outcome isn't what I would prefer or doesn't conform to my wishes.
So true!! Still, I have some near perfect (if they would have LASTED LONGER) crying obs in my past, so sometimes, dreams really do come true!
- •
Thread Starter- carrotcake
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Re: If you had to choose
Intense question! It's hard to say. I don't know if I could be in a relationship with no sex, but then again, I don't know how I could be with a man who didn't cry. I think in the end, I'd have to choose the sex, and satisfy my crying fetish in other ways.
- lemoniep
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Re: If you had to choose
Think I'd go for the sexual relationship, and not even because I enjoy sex all that much. I think it would grate on my nerves if a boyfriend cried all the time. I have to respect the effort taken to not cry in order to be able to really enjoy tears - if he just gave in to tears at any moment, it wouldn't be special. While it frustrates me enormously that there has been no crying on the part of my current boyfriend, I know that when (if) he cries, it will be absolutely incredible to share in that side he never shows.
- meantangerine
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Re: If you had to choose
Lemoniep, I think I agree. Some of the satisfaction comes from the fact that it's a somewhat rare occasion, and I really enjoy working to get that close to someone.
It is such a secret place, the land of tears.
-- Antoine de Saint Exupery, "The Little Prince"
- handkerchief
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- Registered: February 3, 2013
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Re: If you had to choose
Me, I'd take normal sex in a New York minute. I've had a girlfriend who cried at the slightest excuse and I've had one or two who cried very seldom if at all. If I'm in a relationship, I find that I tend to lose interest in crying, but when things start to go south, I get back on the crying.
Last edited by handkerchief (March 26, 2013 3:57 pm)