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December 13, 2023 5:00 am  #1


Traits we share

I suppose I am just curious on the things that make us- besides our fantasies, desires, or simple points of intrigue that have tied us to this forum- so similar.

For instance, as I've mentioned before, I write- be it poetry or a scene in a book, when writing a tearful scene, beforehand I like to act it out, maybe just in my head but sometimes physically- how I imagine a certain actor or character would cry, I act it or feel it out myself. But before I wrote, simply when I was to daydream or fantasize I would do this too. I was wondering if I was alone in that.

All this to say, I'm simply wondering what reasoning, whether emotionally, psychologically, or physically, why we are the way we are.

For instance, when you see someone cry, get tearful, emote, what have you, what do you feel, and where do you feel it? Some, I'm sure, will pinpoint it to simple arousal but for some of us, it is a bit further layered than that.

Have you ever met someone like you, like us? Or do you perhaps see it on a spectrum, a bit in every person but a sliding scale of intensity?

I'm not sure why I'm wondering about this so much lately. Maybe I just feel a bit isolated, or maybe I just enjoy picking the brain of those so similar to me on something I kept secret for so long. I'd love to hear what you all have to say.


What am I if not a woman who likes hot men who cry a lot
 

December 13, 2023 5:49 am  #2


Re: Traits we share

Interesting, by the way, you “owe” us a few fictions. When I write fiction, I don’t act it out, I think how I would like my girl or a female friend or crush to react and how I would trust her if she was genuinely interested in taking care of my tears.

When I see someone cry, it has to be, at least, aesthetic, I feel my heartbeat increase, I feel the desire and the need to feel her tears in my fingers (and if possible in my lips), I feel a heat in my lower abs.

I don’t think I’ve seen any like us (even though I hint I saw one or two) or at least I’m not sure.

Thank you for giving the forum life with this interesting and deep discussion.

 

December 19, 2023 9:36 am  #3


Re: Traits we share

I think there is a spectrum - the folks on this forum are at the upper end of that spectrum. 

There will be people that tears and crying have no effect on - indeed there will be people that are repulsed by the showing of emotions - but there are also people who will say - "her tears look attractive" - or "I like a man that's not afraid to cry and show his tears". These people may not think about emotions often and it might not turn them on but they can find it attractive.

Three people I've met come to mind that I believe are further up the spectrum than this lower level. These are from highest on the spectrum to lowest.

My first girlfriend was a very tearful girl - she looked incredibly beautiful when she was crying and it's where I realised tears turned me on. I was going through a tough time a school with bullying so I'd cry in front of her from time to time. I knew she was 'excited' when tears ran down my cheeks - she once told me she felt all 'funny' watching me cry. Our first kiss was when we were both in tears!

A neighbour, this neighbour is not shy or embarrassed to cry in front of myself or my Wife - she will cry very openly and allow her tears to roll down her cheeks without hiding them - so that's one indicator she likes tears. She also also ask both myself and my Wife if we cry - do we shed tears. We have both been honest and said without giving details that we do cry from time to time and we have both shed tears - you can feel the excitement from her when you tell her this. She has seen my Wife cry twice I think - I was there one time and she actually wiped a tear from my Wife's cheek - I thought she was going to kiss her as well ! It will be come an observation (so more details later) but in the summer I ended up crying in front of her - she hugged me and I could feel an excited shaking in her body. She also wiped a tear from my cheek which I feel is very intimate and she commented that I had incredible, big tears for a man. I also noticed her nipples sudden appeared clearly through her t-shirt !

And finally my Wife - I think a number of factors have to come together but the addition of tears can push my Wife over the edge sometimes. She has also said she finds my tears attractive - and sometimes if I'm crying she becomes very affectionate and very attentive to my tears. These emotional moments have led to very intimate moments ! Led by my Wife I might add. However, sometimes there is no 'turned on' reaction when I cry so it's not just the tears that do it - other feelings and emotions must be at play.

So, long reply - I do believe other people have what we all have - it's just never spoken about - even in the above example no-one has outwardly said the words "I'm turned on by your tears". 
   

 

December 19, 2023 1:33 pm  #4


Re: Traits we share

tearhunter wrote:

I think there is a spectrum - the folks on this forum are at the upper end of that spectrum. 

There will be people that tears and crying have no effect on - indeed there will be people that are repulsed by the showing of emotions - but there are also people who will say - "her tears look attractive" - or "I like a man that's not afraid to cry and show his tears". These people may not think about emotions often and it might not turn them on but they can find it attractive.

Three people I've met come to mind that I believe are further up the spectrum than this lower level. These are from highest on the spectrum to lowest.

My first girlfriend was a very tearful girl - she looked incredibly beautiful when she was crying and it's where I realised tears turned me on. I was going through a tough time a school with bullying so I'd cry in front of her from time to time. I knew she was 'excited' when tears ran down my cheeks - she once told me she felt all 'funny' watching me cry. Our first kiss was when we were both in tears!

A neighbour, this neighbour is not shy or embarrassed to cry in front of myself or my Wife - she will cry very openly and allow her tears to roll down her cheeks without hiding them - so that's one indicator she likes tears. She also also ask both myself and my Wife if we cry - do we shed tears. We have both been honest and said without giving details that we do cry from time to time and we have both shed tears - you can feel the excitement from her when you tell her this. She has seen my Wife cry twice I think - I was there one time and she actually wiped a tear from my Wife's cheek - I thought she was going to kiss her as well ! It will be come an observation (so more details later) but in the summer I ended up crying in front of her - she hugged me and I could feel an excited shaking in her body. She also wiped a tear from my cheek which I feel is very intimate and she commented that I had incredible, big tears for a man. I also noticed her nipples sudden appeared clearly through her t-shirt !

And finally my Wife - I think a number of factors have to come together but the addition of tears can push my Wife over the edge sometimes. She has also said she finds my tears attractive - and sometimes if I'm crying she becomes very affectionate and very attentive to my tears. These emotional moments have led to very intimate moments ! Led by my Wife I might add. However, sometimes there is no 'turned on' reaction when I cry so it's not just the tears that do it - other feelings and emotions must be at play.

So, long reply - I do believe other people have what we all have - it's just never spoken about - even in the above example no-one has outwardly said the words "I'm turned on by your tears". 
   

That’s the Tearhunter I missed.

 

February 12, 2024 9:34 pm  #5


Re: Traits we share

Good evening to you!

I can relate to your relationship with your writings deeply! I tend to act out and even sometimes speak out loud whenever I let a character live through my writings as well, I think it feels relieving to let them act through my body and to let go this feeling when I'm writing! And sometimes writing feels so intense that it becomes vivid, I often have trouble finding my way back to reality after that.

I am very expressive physically, and a little too much emotional, I often feel out of place, or I feel like my emotions are exaggerated or even excessive, although they are sincere and genuine to me. 
Other people's emotions are very contagious to me, so I often end up absorbing everyone's burden, especially when I'm at work and it feels overwhelming and suffocating, to the point that the silliest thing could lead me to a horrible and painful burst of tears (I once cried until exhaustion just because I dropped and ruined a pizza I was cooking for my coworkers)

One of my coworker cried not so long ago because she was stressed out, it was such a horrible and awful feeling. I changed desks to stay with her because she was on her own, and knowing she was alone was even more painful for me. She has always been a very strong and even stoic woman; I felt the bitterness in her heart, her deception and her anger to cry in front of others. Seeing her cry made me react both emotionally and physically. It caused me a lot of pain, but I'm glad she wasn't alone and I could share my own emotions and sensitivity with her. I think, I hope, it might have helped her.

I've never met someone like me yet, I can easily relate to people and yet I feel so far away from them, I don't know how to feel about it
Sometimes I'm not sure if a coworker of mine enjoys tears or not, but I think I've met someone who enjoys seeing people cry without a doubt; my mother– she has never expressed it toward me of course, but we have talked about it because I confess to her a lot, and she admitted to me that she finds interest and appeal in tears, especially from men. 


I hope you're doing well and that you're not feeling too much isolated


« A mon chagrin, il fallait, cette nuit-là, les orgues de la pluie dans les caniveaux et les tonneaux. » — Violette Leduc, La Bâtarde.

my avatar is from a set called "Blessed are those who weep" from the photographer Laura Makabreku
 

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