I remember how a girl was crying in kindergarten, her name was Alina, it was probably 1990, I was 6 years old. I don’t remember how I felt, but I remember her crying face and I remember that I watched, I was attracted to how it was changing. Later, in primary school, when I was 9-10 y.o. before going to bed, I fantasized about saving and comforting the female teachers I liked when they cried and these were very pleasant dreams, I felt excitement and something similar to sexual tension.

Chris wrote:

I remember how a girl was crying in kindergarten, her name was Alina, it was probably 1990, I was 6 years old. I don’t remember how I felt, but I remember her crying face and I remember that I watched, I was attracted to how it was changing. Later, in primary school, when I was 9-10 y.o. before going to bed, I fantasized about saving and comforting the female teachers I liked when they cried and these were very pleasant dreams, I felt excitement and something similar to sexual tension.

Were the fantasies about the teachers based on having actually witnessed any of them actually crying in front of their students?

mistrec wrote:

Were the fantasies about the teachers based on having actually witnessed any of them actually crying in front of their students?

no, then it was just my fantasies) the real case happened when I was in the 6th or 7th grade, 10 y.o.I think. When a rather elderly female teacher start to cry during a lesson in front of the class after a conversation with the mother of one girl, my classmate, who came from a region where there was a war at that moment. But being 10 y.o. I felt already a lot of shame in connection with my feelings about crying. At that moment I remember experiencing very difficult feelings, shame, a lot of shame, but also sympathy and willing to comfort. As a child, I had a notebook where I wrote down events that worried me, and I wrote down this case in it later..

I have two memories but I'm not sure which one comes first - I think I would be about 6 or 7 years old.

The first memory is at school - a girl in my class fell in the playground and started crying. I clearly remember her big brown eyes swimming in tears and large tears rolling down her cheeks. I was instantly attracted to her - I ran to help her and put my arm around her to comfort her - something I'd never consider doing until that point. I feel like I instantly feel in love with her! I would say it was also the first time I noticed that girls can be very beautiful. I also remember that it had a physical reaction - which felt kinda nice! 

My other memory is of an aunt of mine - she was a very glamourous woman and the older I got the more attractive I found her. Around the same time frame as above I remember she was crying about something - no idea what. She was sobbing gently and tears were running freely down her cheeks - I was mesmerised - I remember just staring at her. This may have been the first time I saw an adult cry - I didn't know adults could cry and shed tears. But I remember thinking her tears looked nice to look at.

There are many other later events that cemented my love of tears but these I think are the first.