Yesterday morning, I was feeling upset about something, and I had been holding it in all morning while getting my family up and dressed. Once everyone was downstairs, I was finally alone, and I could feel so much pressure built up against my eyes and in my throat. I turned on the water, and instantly my face collapsed into a lip curl as I let a few tears come out through a silent sob. I got into the shower and just let myself cry. I stood for a couple of minutes leaning against the shower wall, sobbing quietly into my hands, my shoulders shaking and my hands against my cheeks. I could feel the tears mixing with the water on my fingers. I spent the next 10 minutes or so intermittently sobbing, letting the water wash away the tears. I’d stop for a couple minutes, and then the feelings would flood back and I’d pause, face uncovered, sobbing quiet but high pitched rapid sobs, punctuated by shuddering gasps. There was something so satisfying about the hot water washing away the tears as I cried them, and just letting myself release it with the sound of the water around me.

I felt quite a bit better afterward. When I was done, I looked in the mirror and saw that my eyes and face were quite red from the crying and hot water. I splashed cold water on my face and let my face cool while I finished getting ready. Some more tears did continue to leak out, along with some residual silent sobs.