Hi Diana, glad to have you back ​ we seam to have been though similar 're-alignments' in our fetish over the last few months. The way I look at things related to crying has changed and there are a few aspects of emotional release that I feel I want to change other people view / perspectives on - but I don't know if I have the courage to see them through! Still quite confused so this might not make much sense!! I have had to rely on many different people recently. And I have been overwhelmed by the kindness and compassion of so many people - some I only met briefly and others that I have met since my accident and are now almost part of my daily life as a recuperate. And of course family and friends. Post accident I find my emotions/feelings and I guess my vulnerability are completely out in the open. Especially in the early days / weeks I could not control my emotions. Both set backs and gains would cause uncontrollable tears to flow. I found myself crying on my own, with family & friends, with strangers both male and female. This is not necessarily a new thing! I have cried in front of other people before, but it felt different this time!    I now don't view my emotions as a weakness, I think in the past I always have really, even if I've tried to act / say to the contrary I think deep down I have felt guys should not cry and guys should be strong. I also believe that my body is telling me I need to cry - I have and to listen to my body much much more since the accident for many different aspects of my life. I can't do things like I used too. I get tired, small tasks become a huge undertaking because I'm not able to do it the way I used too. I need to be aware of my physical limitations. But, I also need to be aware of my mental limitations and respect and nurture my emotional needs.   So, how has this changed me... I cry whenever I feel like crying - I don't hold it back - I don't hold it in and cry later. Consequently almost everyone close to me has now seen me in tears and a whole host of strangers both male and female have witnessed me crying. I no longer feel embarrassed, I've found that because I'm not holding my emotions back they come out in a more gentle fashion. It's rare for me to sob or make much noise when I cry (although it can happen). Generally my voice wobbles, tears fill my eyes and quickly roll down my face - which I tend not to touch. I try to continue as if the tears where not present. I feel strongly now that people, male and female alike should not be afraid to cry - even in public. I have felts the benefits of crying and really everyone should listen to their bodies and mind and if they are saying cry then you really should. I now hate the stigma attached to cry especially the negative view society has of male crying. I have found I love to be comforted when I cry! (that should please some folks on this forum) I don't like crying alone. The majority of this comfort comes from my wife but I have also been hugged and comforted by family, friends and medical professionals. I've been comforted by male and female alike, but I have to say I much prefer females! I have a physiotherapist who I have worked with since my accident - we have a great patient/professional relationship and a lot of trust has built up between us. After a session which was tiring and painful I burst into tears, without saying anything she hugged me and let me cry into her shoulder for what seemed like an age! When I looked up (still crying) I saw that she was also crying, tears rolling down her cheeks. The sight of her crying made me cry more/harder, the support and compassion of this person blew me away - how could someone who was virtually as stranger at this time be so connected to my struggle that she cried! There was no embarrassment at all, we both felt we need to cry and that was completely 100% ok. But I was also very turned-on, 1) because she looked fantastic in tears, 2) because I felt so vulnerable and her support/comfort was overwhelming and 3) I was turned on by the felling of my own tears, I was turned on when I noticed my tears had soaked into her uniform at her shoulder! And that's something else that's changed, feeling vulnerable and crying turns me on sometimes. I've looked into the mirror watched tears roll down my face and feel myself becoming so turned on that I have to relieve the tension myself!!  I still prefer female tears (by far) but I now find myself turned on by male vulnerability and male tears - I get so turned on watching a tear roll down a guys cheek - I have no sexual feelings towards the guy, just to his tears - weird, still have not worked this one out yet. ​Before this becomes a huge post I'll leave it there for the moment - hope my ramblings make some sense and you and you are able to comment, to help me work some of this out!!  

It's really quite hard for me to be positive about the change in my crying pattern. I mean I'm positive about it within myself - I know my mind and body (well a good part of it, a fair bit is still confused!) and I know I need to cry and resisting that urge is not healthy and potentially damaging to me. You only have to ask the question - why do humans cry / have the ability to cry emotional tears? to realise this is something us humans need to do in times of emotional stress. But, the sight of a guy with tears rolling freely down his cheeks unfortunately sends the majority of people, male & female alike running for the hills. A lot of people can't handle it they simply don't know what to do - I could probably, should probably start a new thread on this one single topic - I've got a lot of experience and examples to share!

I know I need to cry, I don't have the resilience and strength to supress it at the moment, I have a million and one questions, feelings, emotions all mixed up inside that I don't have the focus to stop the tears flowing. I also don't have the room inside my mind to be bothered about it, be embarrassed about it, or worried / concerned what others think about me crying. ​As I said above I'd love to change the world - have everyone feel the same as I do, or at least have a genuine acceptance that sometimes both males and females need to cry and not make judgements about it. Why should crying be seen as a weakness? Trust me, based on what I've been through it is so not weak to cry, it's absolutely vital for my recovery. And it's not just me, I've seen (quick count) at least 5 males with similar life changing injuries openly cry, and not just the traditional male damp eyes, we are talking full on visible, multiple tears flowing down sometimes bearded faces. For one of these observations I actually started crying with the guy, his wife and late teens daughter - 4 adults, 2 male, 2 female all openly crying, not hiding tears at all - and do you know what, it felt great - there was no embarrassment at all. 

But, I will still not be comfortable crying in certain places, I fear crying at work - work places are too judgemental and completive to display every side of you as an individual. People will exploit what they would perceive to be vulnerability. Also, crying in public or large groups, these situations are too cold, there is no support in these situations - and I at least need support when I cry. 

I'm probably rambling, I hope you are all able to follow some of this - it feels good to get it off my chest. 

Yip, the crying observation with my physiotherapist was pretty special - it's not the only one, just the first. She has been incredibly supportive - I owe her so much - and I get to see her cry (she actually very emotional - by her own admission she cries at everything) and she hardly ever wipes her tears away - the perfect physiotherapist for me. 

The being turned on by my own crying and that of other males is the most profound change and confusing one for me. I'm not attracted to guys in anyway. I have also found that I get turned on my females that I don't find attractive as well. As long as tears are visible, that's it I'm physically turned on regardless of how I'm feeling, even if I'm crying! If I'm feeling low and vulnerable I actually enjoy (and I mean really like) to cry in the arms of a female. 9 times out of 10 this is my wife I hasten to add but not exclusively. Apart from my physiotherapist I've cried in the arms of 2 female friends, 1 sister-in-law, 2 nurses and 1 female doctor - only 1 male, my brother!

Out of these people only 1 female friend and 1 of the nurses did not shed a tear with me - yip, my brother cried! It felt so good to cry and let myself be vulnerable completely - felt almost child like. Still confused by all this and still trying to make sense of it all. 

I'm liking the sound of your fantasies - might need to explore this with you some time.... 

Anyway better end this epic sized post!! bit of a mind dump.... 10 points if you read it all

Last edited by tearhunter (February 18, 2016 2:52 pm)

I'm so glad your back ​ you really help by reading my mind dump and bringing the important bits to the surface - thank you - you would not believe how much you are helping me and my messed up mind! I'll discuss a few of your points here but I'll probably start a couple of new threads... I'll definitely start one on how people handle a crying guy but I will expand it to get examples of times that you females have had less than positive reactions to your tears.

I think I am turned on by all aspects of tears. I get turned on by tear filled eyes, I love the point when you see the tear start to form in the eye then it gradually falls through the eyelashes - first tear is generally the best, Tears flowing down cheeks unchecked is just the best sight ever, it's simply stunning beautiful. But the change that's occurred for me is that the sight of perfect tears no longer needs to be on an attractive woman for me to get turned on. Don't get me wrong I much prefer to see a beautiful woman cry than a guy!

One odd thing as well is that I can bring up memories of women that I saw crying years ago that I don't find attractive but now replaying the memory of their attractive tears turns be on. I remember one woman crying as most of our work colleagues were being made redundant - I didn't (still don't) find her attractive at all, in fact the only part of her that was ok (in my view) was her blue eyes - I'm being unkind to her, but she really didn't tick any of my boxes - anyway she had large tears that slowly rolled down her cheek leaving a nice visible wet line - I can orgasm just by replay that memory whereas before it held minimal interest. 

Watching myself cry has become quite interesting and odd at the same time - it turns out I cry just the way I like other people to cry - chance or by design I don't know but my tears are perfect - if I say so myself! I beauty of being turned on by your own tears is that you don't get caught staring and you can let things happen that turn you on more. I've found myself sitting in front of a mirror, pulling my shirt off so that I can watch my tears run down my neck and onto my chest and ultimately reach a huge orgasm in the process! 

I think I understand what you are saying regarding the parallels of listening to other people having sex. Although I had a thought, you mention you want to feel her experience and transfer it to yourself. Does it turn you on because it's a level of sexual pleasure that you don't reach? Some women find it really difficult to orgasm and if they do they are mild - personal question but do you orgasm easily during sex and how intense does it usually get? Moving the parallel back to my crying I cry just the way I want others to cry - if everyone cried like me I'd be happy  

I'll start another thread - if I get time today - about the experiences of being comforted by these various women. In most cases a strong pair of jeans prevents things being too noticeable - but it can be a bit painful for me! I'm not wanting to boast but my wife tells me I'm more than adequate in this area <blush>  but unless the other party presses against me they don't notice which because of the rather intimate nature of it all only happens with my wife - and yes she has noticed many times! That said I think the female doctor mention above might have noticed - I think she might have quite liked me  It was the day after my operation, she was always checking up on me, getting very close as she checked my blood pressure etc... I must have look particular down, she placed a hand on my leg and asked if I was ok. I was only wearing a thin hospital gown so her touch was nice on my leg (should mention she was very pretty, young - big blue eyes, long wavy brown hair and a great body! anyway...) I replied "rubbish" and felt my eyes well up and tears spill out (I was sitting up in bed so that ran down my cheeks) as I quickly switched into crying mode! She, sighed and went "Awww" and leaded over and hugged me for a few seconds and when she pulled back her eyes were swimming with tears - she said "look, your making me cry now" as tears fell down her face. I felt myself getting really hard and the thin/light gown rising!! I shuffled my legs to try and hide it but I was not very mobile at this time so it was not easy. She sighed again, and said "I've got work to do" (smiling) ​wiped the tears from her face leaned over and wiped the tears off my face saying "we can't be having these tears making me cry" - as she turned to leave I'm sure her eyes stopped briefly over the area between my legs! When she was gone I looked down and I could see a noticeable bulge so I'm fairly sure I was rumbled!!

However, she never said anything or particularly reacted to it. 

You ask how well you'd be able to hit it... obviously you don't have an appendage that pops up to say hello, but this female doctor I think did not hide things completely either -- after the hug her nipples where poking through her top - very noticeable! Which I guess is one thing you girls need to be aware of - the other, well, us guys will never know if things are a bit damp down below!!  have you ever experienced these issues before? - do tell  
I'll talk about the vulnerability I felt in the other thread - this is already getting too long again !​   

Last edited by tearhunter (February 19, 2016 4:43 pm)

He He, Sorry - think I blurted all that stuff out with out thinking - that's the problem when your mind goes into overdrive you just type a stream of consciousness without thinking about whether it's particularly appropriate or not - sorry!​ I was just thinking about physical parallels between male and female arousal and how easy it usual is for guys to have the big 'o' where it's not always so easy for females.   Yeah, I guess if crying is not the guys sexual driver then a physical touch no matter how small and innocuous will switch him from his emotional state to sexual state. However if your like me a crying turns me on (even my own crying now) well a touch is likely to keep me on the emotional track. Complicated or what! The mind is indeed a wonderful but compiled and at times frustrating thing.