Crying Lovers / I accidentally discovered a piece of the puzzle of the causes of (my)

**Posted by Ella** September 17, 2021 1:38 pm

I recently figured out another interesting angle/cause to my dacryphilia. First I have to reiterate, for me, 99% of the time my dacryphilia is totally non sexual. If I find a good crying obs, I feel a jolt in my stomach, NOT genitals. (Is there a name for that btw?)

Anyway I pretty much forgot about this board for a few years. I wasnt feeling the need to seek out my crying fix. Then suddenly it was back. What I didn't realize at the time it was gone was the reason. I had been on hormone suppressing birth control. It totally zapped my (already low) libido, which I realized, but what I didn't connect was that it also zapped my need for male crying fixes. When I went off of the hormones a few months ago, I must have had a hormone surge because I suddenly just HAD to go all out, looking up all my old favorite videos, replaying/updating old fantasies, and logging on here again (still non sexual). This awakening has been a refreshing distraction from pandemic life and stress. But yeah until I went on and then off bc I had no idea my dacryphilia was so influenced by hormones.

Side note- ovulation time hormone levels are really....interesting now. Its like everyone moderately attractive I see is way MORE attractive. People are more interesting. Everything is more interesting. I have more self esteem and confidence. It almost feels like being high in a way.

Anyone else notice anything similar?

**Posted by PhoebeOnThePhone** September 22, 2021 7:08 am

Ella, I know just what you mean. My interest also is in men, is also 99% nonsexual, and I also get the body jolt. I believe the term for that is 'whumperflies'. Crying is in the 'whump' category tumblr talks about. Sometimes I gain new appreciation for crying scenes that had never done much for me before.

Edit: I initially said it goes in cycles. I misspoke. I meant my level of interest also waxes and wanes; however, it doesn't occur in any pattern.

Last edited by PhoebeOnThePhone (September 23, 2021 4:30 am)

**Posted by TorNorth** September 22, 2021 10:30 am

I too feel that jolt in the stomach, but it doesn't take long for things to start moving southwards.

My dacryphilia is 100% sexual, and like you my dacryphilia waxes and wanes with my libido. So now that you noticed that correlation, are you still sure that it's non-sexual for you? Maybe you just haven't opened that can of worms.

**Posted by truffle** September 27, 2021 3:04 pm

When I was younger (like 15) this was not sexual for me, and I was only interested in female/femme crying. At that time the whumperflies stayed in my abdomen and the sensation didn’t spread anywhere. I liked hugging crying people and wiping their tears, but I never desired someone sexually after they cried.

Now it’s different. When I see my partner cry, or when I have my tears kissed in just the right way, I still get a whump but now it spreads up and down and everywhere and it’s definitely arousal.

I also recently started an oral contraceptive for the first time ever, and it changed me in a weird way. I get less aroused by seeing women cry. On the other hand, I’m now getting MORE aroused by male crying as well as by my own crying. I’m also crying more easily while taking the pill, which has been inconvenient. Hormones are annoying as hell.

**Posted by Ella** October 5, 2021 8:57 am

PhoebeOnThePhone wrote:
Ella, I know just what you mean. My interest also is in men, is also 99% nonsexual, and I also get the body jolt. I believe the term for that is 'whumperflies'. Crying is in the 'whump' category tumblr talks about. Sometimes I gain new appreciation for crying scenes that had never done much for me before.

Edit: I initially said it goes in cycles. I misspoke. I meant my level of interest also waxes and wanes; however, it doesn't occur in any pattern.

Thank you, I don't think I've seen that word before!

**Posted by Ella** October 5, 2021 9:05 am

TorNorth wrote:
I too feel that jolt in the stomach, but it doesn't take long for things to start moving southwards.

My dacryphilia is 100% sexual, and like you my dacryphilia waxes and wanes with my libido. So now that you noticed that correlation, are you still sure that it's non-sexual for you? Maybe you just haven't opened that can of worms.

I call it 99% nonsexual because there was only one time it "went south" as you say. Prior to that, I thought I was weird and the only person like this (getting a "stomach jolt" and seeking out crying for an emotional high.)

Then in 2015 I was watching one of the infamous crying episodes of breaking bad for the first time and it happened. I was like wtf was that, which led to me to search "arousal from seeing crying" which is how I learned there was a name for it and I found this board.

**Posted by Salt-Treasure** October 18, 2021 10:34 am

For me, it's 100% nonsexual. I also have the nice jolt in the stomach and the emotional high (it's addicting). Nothing jerks in the genital area
About the hormones is a very interesting thought and doesn't sound outlandish at all. Could we be extra protective or caring during ovulation? I will keep an eye on it.

**Posted by PhoebeOnThePhone** October 18, 2021 7:34 pm

Oh thank goodness I'm not the only one who gets an emotional high, because I definitely do.

**Posted by Salt-Treasure** October 19, 2021 5:18 am

PhoebeOnThePhone wrote:
Oh Gott sei Dank, ich bin nicht der einzige, der ein emotionales High bekommt, denn das tue ich definitiv.

That's exactly what I thought when I read it from you

**Posted by Ella** October 28, 2021 1:33 pm

PhoebeOnThePhone wrote:
Oh thank goodness I'm not the only one who gets an emotional high, because I definitely do.

Yes! And chasing that emotional high is definitely addictive